Take Me Home
by Gust-In-A-Flash
Summary: (Sequel to New Beginnings) They say home is where the heart is but is that always true? Having gone their separate ways both Barry and Caitlin need to try and find a way to move on but how do you do that when that one person is still on your mind? With Caitlin in Coast City and Barry in Central City can either of them find their new home?
1. Chapter 1

**So it's finally here… I know a lot have you have been waiting for this due to the amount of messages on twitter … well now the wait is over … enjoy.**

* * *

Have you ever had that dream and I use the word dream loosely as it can border line on being a nightmare – where you try to move but you're glued to the spot unable to move? Since the day I left Central City that dream/nightmare became my life, I walk through it but I'm getting nowhere. I got to work every morning, collect takeout on my way home and sit watching trash TV until I go to bed only to wake up the next morning to do it all over again.

Finishing my shift I went back to my office to collect my purse, walking through the door of my office, I sighed at the mountain of paperwork sitting on my desk. Turning a blind eye to it deciding it can be done on Monday morning. I collected my purse and coat placing my stethoscope in my purse; I left my office again – locking the door behind me. Checking my watch to see it is only 8am – I do hate a night shift. I headed down the hallway and into Mrs Reynolds room, with a little knock I allowed myself access and closed the door behind me while discarding my personal belongings by the door.

"Good morning Mrs Reynolds" I smiled walking over to the bed, pulling the chair.

"How many times call me Joan" she replied moving the bag of grapes closer to me so I can have a nibble.

"I know I'm sorry, shall we get started?" I asked picking one of the grapes out of the bag, popping it into my mouth while grabbing the book for the side of the bed with my other.

"Whenever you're ready, it makes a change to read in a morning"

Shooting her a smile, I opened the book to the page we left off at yesterday. Making myself comfortable in the chair I began to read. Glancing between the page and Joan lay in the bed, Joan thinks I do this to give her some company as she never gets visitors but what she doesn't realise is she is helping me, at the end of every shift I come and sit with her for a couple of hours and we chat and I mostly read to her. She saves me from going home to an empty apartment, where I sit alone and think about everything and everyone – more so one person.

It's been six months and I've tried moving on but I can't do it, everything I do reminds me of Barry, a song on the radio or a TV show that we have watched together or a phrase someone says as they pass by. I have tried everything to move on – going on dates but when I'm on them they feel wrong, as if I am cheating on Barry even if I broke up with him to move here. I didn't think I would miss him this much but I miss him more than I can describe, I miss the way he annoys me to no end, the way he's beside me when I wake up or beside me when I go to sleep. I miss the feel of his arms around me and his lips on mine but what I miss the most if that he understand me – he knows what I'm feeling without me having to say it, he knows how to make me smile when I'm having a bad day and knows how to make laugh when I'm angry with him which annoys me because he never allowed me to be angry with him.

Shaking the thought of Barry from my head, I focused on the book looking quickly at Joan in the bed as I read hoping she didn't notice I drifted off for a second.

" _It would degrade me to marry Heathcliff now; so he shall never know how I love him: and that, not because he's handsome, Nelly, but because he's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same; and Linton's is as different as a moonbeam from lightning or frost from fire"_ I read from the book, feeling the urge to cry at how real it felt.

I stopped reading, re-reading the same passage again in my head, Barry is in my soul and we were one then I went and broke it but from what I've heard he is doing ok. I have spoken to Nora many times since leaving Central City which just reminds me of Barry but I can't just ignore her when she calls because that would be rude and I did promise her I would stay in touch. I refused to ask her plain out right how Barry is but I didn't need to, it was as if she felt the question in my voice and would speak to me a little about him. I know he's been dating and I'm happy for him – happy he has moved on or is trying to move on. I did tell him to, so I can't be angry with him for doing so. Should I have expected him to sit around wait for me, I could have never of done that to him but I will admit it hurts knowing he is moving on – while I'm here unable to do so.

"Are you ok dear?" Joan reached over taking the book from my hand and placing it onto the tray. "It looks like you need to talk"

"I'm ok" I faked smiled knowing I don't need to put all my problems onto one of my patients. "We should continue, you're hopefully going home soon"

"It doesn't matter about the book – I've was young once and I know that look. Who is he?" she sat up on the bed reaching out to take my hand. "You can talk to your Nanna Joan"

"Before I took this job I was living in Central City and I met a guy – not just any guy, I think he was the one and I walked away from him to take this job"

"And he didn't come with you?"

"He couldn't, I asked but already knew he couldn't. His entire life is in Central City and as much as I wanted him too – I couldn't expect him to leave it all behind for me and I couldn't allow him to do long distance so I broke up with him"

"I see – so you left him for a job?"

"I had too" I looked down at my lap. "This job is a once in a lifetime opportunity for me and I couldn't say no so I had to choose between love or my career"

"And you chose the career – have you spoken to him since you left?"

"No, I haven't spoken to him for six months since the day I left. I've picked the phone up more times I can count to call but never press call. I don't know if he will even speak to me if I call. I broke his heart" I admitted,

I've spent almost every night in my apartment staring at the phone, finding Barry's number and hovering over the call button but have never gotten around to pressing call. For all I know he could have changed his number, I thought about sending an email to tell him how I feel then it is up to him if he reads it or replies but when I sit down with my laptop I can never find the words I want to write or they come to me but in a jumbled mess and I send up deleting the email before sending it. I wouldn't be surprised if I'm just a distant memory to him now – just somebody that he used to know. He probably doesn't spend his nights thinking about me like I do him.

"I've tried moving on but I can't, whatever I do he is in my head and I miss him – I miss him more than anything"

"Then maybe you need to speak to him, maybe the key to moving on is to clear all the unspoken words between you both"

"I've spoken to his mom, she made me promise to keep in touch and she tells me how he is doing. I know he's dating again but from what she told me his heart isn't in it." I don't know why I felt the need to share that information but I've never been given the opportunity to speak about how I feel about Barry and now that I have the chance I'm allowing everything to spill out of my mouth without thinking about what I'm saying. "It's gotten to the point I am stalking his social media just to see what he is doing but he doesn't use it much"

"What is this young man like?" Joan asked no doubt just curious for a little information about my life. Being stuck in a hospital bed doesn't give her much form of entertainment and my life is all the entertainment she needs at the moment.

"A pain, he used to annoy me just so I would be angry with him, he said he likes seeing my angry because I look cute. The first time we met I wanted to strangle him, I hated him but he never gave up and I fell in love with him, he became my worlds. Don't get me wrong throughout our relationship I still wanted to strangle him but I wanted to kiss him while doing so, as much as he irritated me he also made the happiest I have ever been in my life. When I first moved to Central City I was running form heartbreak, my old boyfriend cheated on me and had done for two years and he embarrassed me so I ran to hide from it and I never thought I could love again then Barry crashed into my life and he made me believe in love again – he made me feel things I didn't know were possible and it made everything that happened before it look like nothing. He was my world" hearing myself talking about my relationship with Barry just brings everything into context, he was my life. I walked away from the best thing in my life – something that I can never replace and it just make me regret leaving him. If I hadn't of left then where would our relationship be at now? Would we still be happy? If I had of stayed and accepted his proposal, would we be neck deep in wedding plans by now? So many question flooded my mind and all of them I didn't really want answering.

"He sounds like a very nice young man – reminds me of my late husband. He used to do little things just to annoy me. I met my Frank when I was eighteen, I only want on a date with him to stop him asking me and we were married for the best part of sixty years"

"With Barry I went from hating him, to being his friend and then we went to play miniature golf and we made a bet which I lost and I ended up going on a date with him" I laugh at how stupid it sounds because of a bed I fell in love with the love of my life.

"Everyone's story has to begin somewhere – I'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. I was destined to meet my Frank just like you we're destined to meet this young man. You said you ran to Central City to hide but you went there to meet him. You could have moved anywhere but you chose to go there. He is your destiny sweetheart – maybe your story isn't over yet"

"He's moved on" I avoided eye contact realising how much I have screwed my life up by moving here. I should have never of left Barry.

"You don't know that for sure and if he has then maybe you should fight for him. You said he is your life, the one – well then fight for him. It's never too late. Call him, write to him do whatever you need to but don't give up hope. If it's meant to be then you should never give up. Do what you have to do to find out once and for all."

"Thank you"

"No need to thank me dear – I'm here all week" Joan waved her arm in the air.

"No thank you – you have just made me realise what I need to do. I'll come and see you Monday so make sure you don't go anywhere." I warned her knowing if I'm going to do this then I'm going to need her here when I get back.

"I'm going where until my doctor says so" she winked at me knowing I am the only one with the power to allow her to leave. "Have a good weekend"

"Wish me luck"

"Good luck my dear"

Collect my belongings from the doorway, I headed out of the hospital and to my car. If I'm going to do this – to test the water and see how things stand then I can't call or text, I'm going to have to go and see him, talking to him face to face and see if we do have a future – I hope Joan is correct and we do have a future.

* * *

 **So there you have it – the first chapter of Take Me Home – what did you think?**

 **6+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	2. Chapter 2

**OMG I can't believe the response to the first chapter… thank you all so much for coming back and reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter.**

 **AReiss215** – I know how excited you have been for this… you've asked me every day about it haha and we've spoken about everything else so I don't think I need to repeat myself with that.

 **Raquel** – The book they were reading is wuthering heights and let's hope she can win his heart again… that's if Barry allows her in again… we'll have to wait and see what happens next. The reason I called her Joan is because I was going to make her Joan Garrick then decided I didn't want to use Jay at all in this … even dead so I changed the last name.

 **Anskyfighter** – I think about of people want that to happen but we'll have to wait and see what happens. She needs to prove to Barry she can be trusted. Barry's POV is this chapter so enjoy it.

 **Lina** – I can't really answer this apart from you'll have to keep reading to find out what happens next.

 **Katmerlos** – all I can say once again is wait and see. You'll see where Barry is at in this chapter then you can decided or make your mind up on what you think will happen.

 **Fanfan** – well I hope you like this chapter as much as the last one.

 **Killie159** – yes I'm back, I always come back haha. Well you're about to find out.

 **Guest** – aren't we all haha.

 **Clashofthelegends** – there was always going to be a sequel to this… do you really think I would leave it there? I just wanted you all to think I was.

 **AusllyRauralover100** – I hope you like this chapter.

 **ModDino** – always a planned too... Enjoy this chapter.

 **Guest** – thank you… hopefully you will continue to enjoy this.

 **Promise10** – well welcome back to the madness… I do write as far ahead as I can which mean I can update faster. I have been working on this for about 2 months now. I hope you enjoy this chapter.

 **SoManyFandomsUrHeadExplodes98** – first of all thank you for having the longest username possible haha. So happy you like the first chapter – hopefully the second will not disappoint.

 **Spidey2026** – well thank you for sticking with my madness for so long … a lot would have given up a long time ago. I hope you like this chapter.

 **MellowLimerence** – I hope the wait was worth it … yes she is regretting leaving Barry but who wouldn't hello he's everything a girl could want (I want my own Barry Allen but everyone already knows that) they will meet again… very soon but you'll have to wait and see what happens.

 **Gokulordz** – not sure what you are thanking me for to be honest.

 **Guest** – By Car around 8 hours but in the last chapter of NB I said 2 days but that is because Cait wasn't going straight there. She took a small D-Tour to another location before going straight there – By Train around 3.

 **CaliMalice** – thank you so happy you liked it … hopefully you will like this one as well.

 **Blurrok28** – I always planned this sequel for that ending… not everything can have a happy ending… let's hope this one does.

 **TheBeezekneeze** – you're about to find out how Barry is handling everything… so happy you love this … I hope that continues.

* * *

 _Her hands ran down my chest, undoing the buttons of my shirt on her journey to my belt. Her lips moving over my neck making my skin tingle from where she trailed her lips from my ear to my collar bone while her laugh echoed around my head – the laugh that is music to my ears. My hands held her waist as she straddled me on the bed, since the moment we made it to the bedroom I have been hers to do whatever she felt she had too. Pushing herself up to rest on her knees, lifting her head from my neck her eyes hovered over mine, searching my face. Slowly moving closer she allowed her lips to ghost over mine but never touch them. I tried lifting my head to complete the connection but every time I tried she would pull away with a wicked laugh._

" _You're a tease" I smirked moving my hands to the back of her thighs, slowly sliding them higher and higher until her dress bunched at her waist._

" _Don't act as if you don't like it" she whispered into my ear, her teeth lightly nibbling at my ear lobe._

" _I didn't say that – I'm just saying you're teasing"_

" _It's half the fun baby"_

 _Finally her lips found mine in a deep passionate kiss that ended sooner than I would have liked. Pulling back she sat upright on her knees, her eyes maintaining contact with mine and she slowly reached for the zipper at the back of her dress, her teeth digging into her bottom lip as she peeled the dress from her body, pulling it up over her head and discarding it onto the floor beside the bed – leaving her sat above me in a matching twin set. If she wasn't already driving me insane – then she is now._

" _You're so beautiful" I ran my hands up the side of her torso, cupping her breasts with my hands over her bra – give a light squeeze._

" _And you're wearing too many clothes – don't worry I plan on correcting that" she smirked tugging at my belt and she undid it, quickly followed by my jeans._

 _Lifting my hips I allowed her to move my jeans down my legs so I could kick them off, placing her hand behind my head she forced me to sit up – only so she could push the shirt from my shoulder before forcing me back down onto the bed. Entwining her fingers with mine, she moved them above my head allowing her to hover over me but not allowing me to touch her._

" _You're mine – you'll always be mine" her whispered voice echoed around my head, almost haunting me._

"Cait" I bolted upright on the bed, I looked around the unfamiliar surroundings. My heart pounded against my ribs, my breathing fast and heavy. Running a hand down my face I tried to bring myself back to reality.

"It's Carly" a female voice said beside me; bring back the night's events to me. "Are you ok?"

"I have to go" I threw the sheets away from my body the moment Carly switched the light on beside the bed.

"Another part of you doesn't look ready to leave" she looked down at my waist to where I was hard beneath my boxers.

"I have to leave – don't get me wrong you're great but tonight was a mistake, it should have never of happened" I explained while trying to put my jeans on, jumping into them in an attempt to get dressed quicker.

"You're actually leaving – now?" she looked at me as if I had two heads. Am I not making myself clear?

"I have too – you're a really nice person but as I said this was a mistake" I collected my shirt from the floor, slipping my arms into the sleeves I began to button it up.

"Do you have a girlfriend or something – is that it?"

"Or something" I replied as it's the truth. I have an ex-girlfriend who no matter what I do, remains front and centre on my mind. "I have to go" I said once again while heading towards the door.

"Unbelievable" I heard Carly say as I left the bedroom. I know it's not very gentlemanly of me to run but I need to get out of there. How can I sleep next to another girl while Caitlin is still on my mind?

"I'm sorry" I spoke over my shoulder as I exited the bedroom, closing the door behind me.

Leaving Carly's apartment I headed out into the cold night air. I began to walk through the almost silent streets of Central City wondering what Caitlin is up to now – is she in bed? Does she even think about me?

All the time Cait is on my mind, wondering what she is doing, if she is ok but I can't call her. She probably doesn't want to speak to me anyways – she has her new life now. I'd be surprised if she still remembers me. I know it's not going to take long for some guy to replace me, Cait is the best person I have ever known and any girl would be lucky to have her – I was lucky to have her. Even now I don't know what she saw in me, someone as brilliant and smart as Caitlin being remotely interested in me, I can still laugh about it at times.

The amount of times she told me she loves me, they made me feel as if I was walking on cloud nine knowing she wanted me, she wanted to spend time with me. Even after all these months I can't help but wondering that if she was pregnant would she have stayed with me? If the baby was real would we be cuddled up at home talking about baby names or decorating the nursery? Am I even ready to be a father? I know it wasn't real but it did make me revaluate my life as soon as my dad told me she thought she was pregnant and it made me realise that I wanted my future to be with Cait. I wanted to marry her and not just to make her stay, I wanted to have a family with her but I didn't fight hard enough for her and she left me – left what we could have had.

Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I checked the time just after one in the morning. What caught my attention most was my wallpaper, a photo of Cait and me something I have been unable to change since she left. The girls I have dated have asked about her, who she is and I simply tell them that she is a friend – not a lie, she is my friend. I could have described her as my best friend – she understood me better that anyone else. She told me to move on and find someone who makes me happier than she did and I've tried to do that but every girl I've met doesn't come close to her, my mom had now taken to arranging dates for me with her friends daughters, when I met Caitlin I thought that would be the end of my mother trying to set me up with some random girl.

It doesn't matter how many of her friend's daughters she tries to make me ask out on a date, none of them will make me feel how Caitlin did. From the moment I saw her I knew she was the one for me, why else would I have gone to all the effect to make her talk to me, let alone date me. From that very first morning in Jitters when I 'attacked' her coffee the glare she gave me, the cold shoulder was enough to have me hooked on her. I only wish I had of taken her coffee out on purpose just to make her talk to me but I didn't it was an accident.

Arriving back at my apartment block, I continued to walk straight past the entrance knowing I can't go in yet, everything reminds me of her – nothing more so than my bed where we spent many night and lazy Sunday mornings cuddled together watching movies, talking about random things mostly anything that came to mind or watching animal video's on YouTube.

Finding myself out the all night diner, the one place I never went with Cait, I headed inside hoping it will help me escape from her but deep down I knew it wouldn't, she's inside my head, she's in every cell of my body, so forgetting about her isn't as simple as that. The only plus side to this place is nothing inside can remind me of her.

Pulling the door opened I found the place almost empty apart from a couple a truckers who have made a pit stop as they headed through town. Taking a booth at the back corner of the diner by the window I looked out at Central City, how calm it looked at this time of night almost as if everything is right with the world when it's not. It's far from ok.

"What can you get you sweetie?" a women in her early forties ask grabbing my attention.

Turning to look at the women dressed in a light pink dress, a white apron wrapped around her waist and a small pad and pencil in her hand ready to write my order down. "Can I get a coffee and a slice of cherry pie please" I smiled at the women. Cherry pie might remind me of Cait but it's my favourite so I'll have to suck it up and not crying into my pie.

"Coming right up"

Leaning against the back of the booth, I remove my phone from my pocket to check the time – almost 3:30 in the morning. How my life came to walking around town in the middle of the night I don't know. When I wanted to escape I would go back to my parents' house and talking to them about my problem but I can't with this. My mom misses having Caitlin around as much as I do, I know my dad does but he will not admit I, he may have been her boss but she was more than that to my dad. My mom still believes I'm going to be able to bring Caitlin back that somehow I will talk her into moving back here again – I just wish I have her belief because it's an impossible task that I am never going to accomplish.

"Here you go son – I gave you a larger slice looks like you could use it. Shout if you need a refill" the waitress smile placing my pie and coffee down in front of me.

"Thank you" I smiled stabbing the pie with my fork.

The moment the pie hit my lips I regretted ordering it, the memory of the night we had dinner in my apartment which wasn't any special until Cait surprised me with cherry pie she had bought on her way on from work. We both sat on the sofa, eating straight from the pan with two forks and a can of whipped cream – somehow we managed to eat all the pie, even if a good amount of it ended up covering our faces and clothes. The mess started by Caitlin who demanded I allow her to spray the whipped cream into my mouth which I finally allowed her to do, only for her to spray it all over my face as well.

"What's eating at you son?" the waitress slipped into the booth opposite me.

"Nothing" I replied knowing it wasn't her business and that she didn't care about my tragic love life.

"Fool me; you've been sulking into your pie since I gave it you to. Hardly touched it"

"Heartbreak" I said the one word that said everything.

"A sick son of a bitch but all part of the game we call life – we are talking about a girl right? You never know these days"

"Yes it's a girl" I told her wondering why she got the impression I could be gay from.

"Looking at your face, it tells me you and this girl have unfinished business so maybe you should finish whatever it is" with that said she walked away.

Quickly finishing my pie and coffee, I left the money on the table with a nice tip for the waitress and left the diner and headed home to pack a bag. The waitress is right, I need to see Cait to find out once and for all if we have any sort of future and allow us both to say things we've never been able to say to each other. It's the only thing we can do now because I'm out of ideas. I have tried moving on an I have tried sitting around hoping she will come back and neither of them are working so I need to take action and do something about it.

* * *

 **Well everything is going wrong for Barry… poor soul.**

 **What did you think?**

 **Next chapter they will meet again! Who's wants that?**

 **6+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – well you do know most of what is going to happen so there isn't much I can say apart from no doubt I will speak to you on Twitter once you have read this.

 **Raquel** – yes he wants her back and they will meet again …. It's all very exciting.

 **Snowb4rry01** – read on to find out… I think it's hard for them both… remember Barry was/is her happiness and she walked away from that and now she is/might be regretting doing so.

 **Anskyfighter** – so does mine… he's just a little puppy who need love… as for everything else … it's coming.

 **Lina** – all will be answered in this chapter so I hope you like it.

 **Katmerlos** – Who doesn't want to give him a hug? You'll see what happens now.

 **Fanfan** – thank you … I don't really know what else to say but enjoy.

 **Killie159** – no he isn't giving up yet… he still thinks there is hope from them yet.

 **LizzyMargaret** – you'll have to keep reading to find out what happens next… she might stay with her but she couldn't at the same time… this is all about moving on after all.

 **Promise10** – they are going to meet don't worry about it …. Not much of a SB fic if they don't meet again.

 **SoManyFandomsUrHeadExplodes98** – don't worry about the UN being so long… I sort of like it haha. If you know me then I try to stay away from the cliché's as much as I can but some still sneak in there but all is answered in this question.

 **Spidey2026** – I hope you think it is good as well. Yes they both are still trying to move and fi what is broken but can they do it?

 **MellowLimerence** – yes he's dreaming about Caitlin, who knows what is going to happen … I do because I wrote it but you know.

 **Guest** – Thank you!

 **Blueefaiiryy** – we'll have to wait and see what happens… it's too early to say.

 **Eera2611** – thank you … enjoy this chapter.

 **Guest13** – I think I know what you are hinting at… they are going to meet again but I don't think you're going to get everything you want.

 **1ShannonB** – thank you… I hope you like this one.

 **Foreveryoung07** – they are going to meet but not how you said… sorry.

 **Kapilsmriti24** – well I hope the time you spent reading them was worth it… and thank you for the compliment but I know I can do better and I try and make each chapter better than the last but I don't always manage to do it but I'll never stop trying.

 **A/N: I would like to apologize for taking so long to update but I was sick last week so I've fallen behind on all my writing and updates… I hope you can forgive me for that!**

 **This chapter is part 1 of 2 as I wanted to update something so spilt the chapter in half as the other half isn't finished yet and I think you've waited long enough but I promise to update part 2 a lot quicker than this chapter.**

 **I'm don't now … so enjoy**

* * *

"Can you tell me when the next train to Coast City is?" I tried to catch my breath as I arrived at the station. The woman sat in the small ticket office looked at me as if I had just told her I had killed her puppy. I admit I might look like a mad man on a mission but that is because I am, I might be out of breath and sweaty but so would you if you had ran all the way here.

"You've just missed the eleven o'clock, next on is at noon"

Why does this always happen to me? Why can't I ever be on time or even better early for things? I own many watches including the nice on currently on my wrist that Caitlin got me for my birthday and I'm late. I had planned on getting the first train this morning but ended up falling asleep after I had packed my bag, I sat and watched the clock tick waiting for the train station to open and ended up falling asleep. For once in my life I wish something would go right for me.

Sighing I looked back at the woman opposite me. "One way to Coast City please" the bright side I know I can't miss this train as I'm already here but I wouldn't put anything past me at this point. Handing the money over I took the ticket and went in search for my platform, if I'm sat beside the train then not even I can miss it right?

Making my way over to the large board, I began to search for my train and platform amongst the many destinations. Finally spotting my train and platform on the last of the many information boards I pulled my duffle bag onto my shoulder and headed for platform eight. For once I am going to get something right, I am going to get on this train and I am going to see Caitlin again and that is all what matters right now. arriving at my platform I sat down on one of the benches as my phone began to ring in my pocket, I don't know why by a small part of my thought it would be Caitlin – almost as if she knows I'm going to Coast City then again it could simply be because I'm thinking about her and I want it to be her after hearing nothing from her for the past six months I doubt it will be her but I still felt disappointed to see Eddie's name flashing across my screen instead of Caitlin's.

"Eddie" I spoke into the phone.

"Are you still in bed, I'm outside your apartment with Cisco and we're ready to go – so open the door Allen" he shot back down the phone making me wish I had of just ignored his call.

"Go – go where?" I asked confused ignoring the fact that he said they are currently stood outside my apartment.

"Paint balling, we've had this planned for a month – you forgot didn't you?"

"Just a little – go without me"

"We're not going without you – now open the door and let's go"

"Come on Barry – we've been here for a good fifteen minutes" I heard Cisco shout down the phone making me roll my eyes.

"I'm not at home, I'm at the train station – just go without me" I told Eddie again knowing the last thing I wanted to do is run though trees having little pellets of paint shot at me.

"Train station – where are you going?" he asked surprised but no doubt more curious as to why I'm taking a sudden trip no one knows about.

"Coast city, I'm going seeing Caitlin" squeezing my eyes shut I waited for his reply knowing he is going to have an opinion and this is why I didn't want to tell anyone about it. Why did paint balling have to be today? If it was any other day then I could have left without anyone knowing.

"Dude that is such a bad idea, do you not remember how you felt when she left? Why go and see her just to torcher yourself? You've finally started moving on and now you want to go and see her so she can get her claws back into you. What is wrong with you? You were miserable for months after she left so why drag all that back up by going there to see her knowing you have to come back" Eddie started to lecture me down the phone. I rolled my eyes at him once again knowing how he was when him and Iris broke up for two weeks, all he cared about was her, all he spoke about was her so he must understand how I am feeling.

"That's the thing man, I'm not over and I haven't even started to get over her. I miss her and I need to see her even if it is just too finally let go of her. I know you probably won't agree with me but I need to do this even if it is only for my own sanity. No matter what I do she is on my mind and we need to talk about all the things we didn't before she left. If I am to finally accept it's over then I need to see her to make sure there is nothing between us anymore because I miss her."

"Pick up a phone then, don't travel to her"

"Goodbye Eddie" hanging up I slide my phone back into my pocket knowing no matter what he says it's not going to change my mind, I'm going to Coast City even if it's only for Caitlin to slam the door shut in my face.

Checking my bag, I made sure I had the paper I wrote her new address down on from the return label on the package she sent me. Returning some of my things she had accidently packed before her move so she felt the need to return them to me even if it was only bits of junk that I didn't even notice was missing. What made me write her address down I don't know but I'm happy I did now. Coast City is a large place and finding Caitlin would be difficult with her address.

Checking my watch I noticed I still had thirty minutes until my train arrived. Placing my duffle bag onto my shoulder I headed to the closet coffee shop to get a boost. Joining the line I waited ten minutes for my coffee – it's as if they think people have nowhere else to be and then into the small book store to find a book for the three hour journey – I need to do something to fill the time or else I'll drive myself crazy constantly checking my watch to see how long I have until I arrive in Coast City. Picking up a Dan Brown book I haven't read yet, I quickly paid for the book and headed back to my platform knowing my train is due at any moment and I can't miss this one because of a takeout coffee and a book. Taking my seat on the bench again, surprised that not many people were heading to Coast City but it probably us a little cold at this time of year so I don't blame them.

The train finally pulled into the station in front of me as I stood, grabbing my bag and waited for the other members of the people to disembark the train before I could get on and find a good seat, what I didn't expect was to see Caitlin getting of the train. For a moment I froze wondering what she could be doing here – why is she here? Is it too much to think that she is here for me? There are hundreds of reasons why she is here but I want it to be for me – I want her to be here for me. snapping back into the real world, I watched as she took a couple of steps down the platform towards the exited before pushing myself through the crowd to get to her, apologizing to all the people I bumped into.

Reaching my hand out I lightly tapped her shoulder to her attention which worked, spinning around her eyes landed on my in shock but I couldn't help the smile on my face at seeing her again.

* * *

 **Part 1 of 2**

 **What do you think?**

 **How do you think Caitlin will react to seeing Barry at the train station?**

 **The second part will be posted a lot sooner than this was…**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – I know you had to hear about these chapters a lot while I plotted them but couldn't write them – 4 days of looking at a blank screen for hours I'm sorry about that but your favourite is back… you know who it is. It wasn't much of a cliff-hanger it could have been much much much worst and you know it anyways I'll see you on twitter once you have read this.

 **Raquel** – probably the other way around Barry will probably ask her why she is here. Eddie was a little mean but he's also seen the pain Barry has been through since Cait left so I understand it. He's watched his friend hurt for months and now he's going to visit her which will only set him back on his attempt to move on. Eddie is just looking out for his friend.

 **Snowb4rry01** – thank you I'm feeling a little better not 100% yet but oh well. Who knows how Cait will react and for once Barry Allen being late is a good thing.

 **SoManyFandomsUrHeadExplodes98** – well you might tear up again – just a warning.

 **Spidey2026** – we all want it to happen – we're all on the same ship – maybe lifeboats at the point who knows. I hope I updated fast enough for you.

 **MellowLimerence** – as I said further down you have to understand Eddie – he watched his friend hurt for months because Cait left and when it finally looks like he is moving on he wants to go and visit the person who hurt him. Eddie is just looking out for his friend; he doesn't want Barry to get hurt again… you must understand that? A meanie for making you wait for that chapter if so I am sorry but I was sick and unable to write if you mean for Part 2 then I updated quicker than I normally would.

 **Guest** – thank you … enjoy part 2.

 **ShanouNash** – well I did but I'm updating quicker then I normally would so that should make up for it. Enjoy part 2

 **Kapilsmriti24** – I think that is what everyone wants but it's not going to be that easy.

 **Jdcocagirl** – well I don't really know what to say other than you'll have to keep reading to find out what happened but apart from that I thought I made it clear she was going to Central City to visit him.

 **Fannieherr** – love is very powerful indeed.

 **Eera2611** – I'm sorry but I did say I would update quicker so here it is… enjoy.

 **Isaboo26** – sorry but part 2 is here so enjoy.

 **ENJOY PART TWO!**

* * *

Tossing the latest edition of Vogue onto the empty seat beside me I sighed in frustration, having given up on Thomas Hardy's Desperate Remedies well over an hour ago being unable to concentrate on the text. This is taking for too long – Why can't I be there already? Even when I get there what am I to do? Check into my hotel and then what knock on Barry's door and hope he accepts me turning up out of the blue? Since when did my life become an Adele song?

Hitting the home button on my phone bringing it to life I noticed I still had another twenty minutes until I arrive in Central City. Picking my phone up I unlocked it and scrolled through my contacts finding the name I wanted. Hitting call I pressed the phone to my ear and listened as it began to ring.

"Caitlin Snow, where have you been? It has been two weeks and I've heard nothing for all I know you could have been killed? What happened to calling me every week? If I knew you work schedule then I would have called – I did call but you haven't returned my calls. I was so close to calling Coast City police to track you down to make sure you are ok?"

"Hi to you too" I laughed remember how much she likes to over react. "I meant to return your calls but I've been working a lot lately – there is a lot of paperwork involved with this job" I laughed unsure if she is really angry at me or not – I can never tell.

"It's ok dear just remember I worry – so what's new?"

"I was wondering if you would like to get lunch tomorrow, I'm on my way to Central City now?" I asked already knowing the answer, if there is one thing Nora Allen loves more than worrying is a good gossip.

"Does Barry know you are coming?" she shot back down the phone at me.

"No, I want to surprise him – he is the reason for my visit" I admitted knowing I might be here for Barry but that doesn't mean I can't have lunch with the woman who has become like a mother to me. She's more of a mother than my own that is for sure. I have been in Coast City for six months and not once has she come to visit me – hell I don't even know if she's in Coast City or even alive.

The conversation followed as we spoke about what I have been up to and vice versa – everything from work to my none existent social life while she told me about what Barry has been up to and it made me happy to know he is going out and having fun but also makes me regret coming here, what if he doesn't want to see me? What if he has moved on? He is going on nights out with everyone so he must have met someone new by now. I know I told him to do that but it still hurts to think of him with someone else but I only have myself to blame, I gave up on us and walked away even after her got down on one knee and begged me to stay, he tried everything to get me to stay and I never truly saw what I had in front of me until it was too late.

To late being three weeks back in Coast City, having not spoken to Barry let alone seen him when I was used to seeing him every day – to the point we were living together, I would wake up beside him and fall asleep beside him, having gone to from that to nothing made me realise how much I did miss him and what I had walked away from so I can't blame him for meeting someone new. He's only doing what I told him to, I told him to go and find someone who makes him happy – happier than I made him and he made me.

"Nora?"

"Yes sweetheart"

"Do you think he will want to see me?" I questioned needing to know if I have made the right decision coming here – maybe I should have just left him be. Allow him to move on properly – if he hasn't already maybe coming back here and seeing him again will make me realise that he is better off without me, that coming here will reopen all the wounds from me leaving that have slowly began to heal for us both.

"I think he'll be happy to see you. He puts on a brave face but I know he still misses you even if he will not admit it. You were the best thing to happen to him" I felt a small smile tug at the corners of my lips. I hope she is telling me the truth and not just what I want to hear because seeing him again is going to hurt – he's proof of a life I gave up, the best life.

"You're wrong – he's the best thing that happened to me and I ruined it thinking there was something better out there" I admitted knowing now leaving was the biggest mistake of my life.

If I could turn back time, I would have stayed. I would have been content with the life I had and I wouldn't try and chase a career that might move me up the ladder when it comes to my career but doesn't make me happy. Doesn't fill that void and loneliness, it great having a dream job but that dream job doesn't hold you at night when you feel sad or when you're lonely.

"It might not be everything you thought it would be but you said you had to try and you have"

I feel silent thinking about what she said, I did say I had to try but I don't know what she means. It that her way of saying give up and move back to Central City or that I made my decision and I need to deal with that or maybe I am just simply over thinking everything.

"Caitlin, are you still there?" Nora asked as I still hadn't responded to her.

"I'm here" I confirmed knowing I could up with many more meanings to what she said. If she wanted to elaborate then she would.

"I also have a confession to make – when Barry said you asked him to go with you, I told him he better not leave Central City but the truth is I didn't want either of you to leave, if I made him stay I thought you would have stayed as well. I would have let him go with you if it meant you both being happy – I would have happily of waved you both off knowing you had each other. I was selfish thinking making him stay would make you stay" she confessed which made me want to cry, not because she forced Barry to stay hoping it would make me stay but the fact she felt the need to tell me this.

"No – I should have never of asked him to come with me, his home is in Central City"

"As was yours but you still left"

"I asked him to come with me because I'm selfish – I wanted both worlds Barry and the job and I didn't think about how they would affect Barry. I thought we would move and everything would be fine but Barry is need at the CCPD and in Central City where his family and friends are whereas I don't really have a home. I don't have roots anywhere. I'm still looking for a place to settle" I know I don't have a home in Coast City at one point I did but not anymore, I thought I could go back and everything would be fine but it isn't.

"Your family is here"

"I'm sorry I have to go, I'm about to arrive. Lunch tomorrow I will text you" I hung up.

I might have come across as rude but I can't listen to her confirm that I made the biggest mistake of my life. I already know that – I already know I screwed everything up without being reminded of that. How many night I woke in the middle of the night to find the other side of the best empty when I expected to find Barry, where I could curl up in his arms and he would hold me until I fell back asleep. Instead I had to settle for a pillow to cuddle.

Pulling into the station, I grabbed my weekend bag and head for the exit, to find a cab and go to my hotel before tracking Barry down. Do I just knock on his front door and hope for the best or come up with some game plan on how to work this. I can't just run into his on the street because he will think I'm here and didn't want to see him when that is the best thing I wanted. Stepping of the train, I kept my head down and headed towards the exit as soon as I'm in my hotel room I can come up with a plan of action – anyone who knows me knows I like to plan ahead.

Feeling a tap on my shoulder making me jump due to the fact wasn't expecting it; I turned around and felt my jaw hit the floor as my eyes landed on Barry. A million and one reasons for him being here came to mind. Did Nora somehow send him a message telling him I was coming – is he coming to see me- meet me?

"Barry" his name fell from my lips in shock.

* * *

 **So that was part 2 what did you think?**

 **I hope you didn't find it to boring.**

 **What do you think will happen next?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – they're not cliff hangers. Momma Allen is back but for how long – why do I bother with you…. you already know the answer to this… so I'll just say … speak to you on twitter once you have read this.

 **Raquel** – if she takes Henry with her you'll have to wait and see. I'm giving no spoilers away.

 **Snowb4rry01** – anyone who knows me knows that I am a big fan of Momma Allen even if her character is made up in my mind. I love her - she is just awesome!

 **Katmerlos** – well you can find out now.

 **Guest** – I'm sorry.

 **TheLastWinchester** – sorry but I don't think of the as cliff hangers. And sorry again so switching it up again … they do meet this chapter I promise.

 **Guest** – My bad… is it a bad thing if you get addicted?

 **Chariin** – well your wait is finally over.

 **Guest** – It's here now!

 **ShanouNash** – I'm sorry but it was supposed to be one whole chapter. So really think of it as the same chapter… I left you hanging once. That is the idea, she is supposed to be the Momma Cait doesn't have anymore … that is why at the end of New Beginnings Nora told Barry to remind her of the family she has in Central City meaning Nora and Henry as well as Barry… they became her family… the three of them accepted her as part of the family.

 **Kapilsmriti24** – No Drama here … not yet anyways

 **Fannieherr** – Cait and Momma Allen chapters are the best … Momma Allen is savage and she knows it but doesn't care.

 **Isaboo26** – I didn't know that would make anyone cry so sorry! You'll have to read on to find out what happens next.

 **Lizzy-Margaret** – I'm also a hopeless romantic so never say never

 **Foreveryoung07** – well now you will find out what happens next.

 **AngelOfTheSea** – Well thank you for spending your time reading all of this… I hope it was worth it. Momma Allen is my favourite… I want her to be my Momma and don't compare her to Mama Smoak … anything Felicity or Olicity is annoying me at the moment … it's taken over the entire show … no need for it … they've ruined Arrow with it… sorry I'm just ranting now.

 **Gokulordz** – Caitlin in is in Central City.

 **A/N Sorry for taking so long to update but for those who follow me on twitter you know why for those who don't I am not well at the moment so updates are taking a little longer than normal … I hope you can understand and will be patient with me. I am trying my best to get them out as soon as I can.**

* * *

"Barry" his name fell from my lips in shock.

My eyes searched his face wondering if this is real or if I'm still on the train and I've fallen asleep meaning all this is a dream. I would love nothing more to step off the train and see Barry there to meet me – he somehow knows that I am coming to town; he wants to see me as much as I want to see him so he meets me off the train. If this I reality and he is really stood her in front of me and not just my imagination playing tricks on me then judging by the look on his face he is just as shocked to see me here as I am to see him.

One thing I do know for sure is time is a cruel bitch – Barry looks amazing probably better than when I first met him and I no doubt look a mess having worked a night shift, gone home to grab my overnight bag and headed to the train station. Why didn't I spent a little time making myself look presentable but then again I never expected to see him here. My plan was to go straight to my hotel, get some sleep, freshen up and then go and see Barry not step off the train looking like I haven't showered for a week and have him stand before me.

My eyes landed on my mouth – his smart mouth which used to annoy me to the point where I wanted to pull my hair out while screaming at him to shut up or maybe it was just screaming in frustration either way his lips still looked as kissable as the day I left. I waited for him to say something – anything but every time he opened his mouth, he would close it again like a fish repeating the process over and over again as if he didn't know what to say. Placing my bag onto the floor beside me, I reached my hand out to close his mouth resisting the urge to caress the soft skin of his jaw and cheek but it didn't stop me from groaning internally.

"Barry Allen speechless – there is a god" I laughed trying to avoid the awkwardness surrounding us. I imagined our first encounter with each other over and over again and not once did I think it would be awkward, it's never been awkward between us, Barry has always been confident and commanding from the very first day I met him but then again I did break his heart and then out of nowhere decided to invade his life again when he is trying to move on – I probably should have counted this factor into the equation of how this will play out but I never did. I expected to come back here and see confidant and commanding Barry not speechless and shocked Barry.

"Wh-wh-what are you doing here?" Barry stuttered his emerald eyes still fixed on mine for what was beginning to feel like a lifetime, not that I'm complaining about it.

"How about we get a coffee and then we can chat?" I suggested knowing I could do with a boost right now. If it wasn't for the fact that Barry stood right before me I would be regretting coming here right now – not for any other reason apart from the fact I have just come off a night shift and I'm exhausted.

"Already got one" Barry suddenly found his voice again while holding up the paper take out cup up in front of my face.

It was at that moment I noticed the buffle bag on his shoulder. "Oh my you're catching a train, I'll leave you too it. You don't want you to miss it" I smiled grabbing my overnight bag to leave him be but couldn't help but wonder why Nora never told me Barry was leaving town. She would know so why didn't she tell me so on the phone – maybe I should have called ahead and saved myself the wasted journey, I came all this way to see Barry and he's leaving – talk about karma.

"Latte wait" Barry grabbed my arm. Just the sound of my old nickname and his voice saying it is more than enough to make me want to fall to my knees and beg him to forgive me for everything I've done. "Sorry I know you don't like it when I call you that"

"I don't mind" for one in my life it didn't bother me that he called me 'Latte' it reminds me of the best time of my life – my time spent with him before I ruined everything good in my life for what I thought could be better even if I knew there is nothing better for than Barry I still always have to ruin everything good in my life. "Barry your train" I reminded him.

"The train doesn't matter anymore" he spoke from behind the paper cup. "And would you look at that – my cup if empty so what about that coffee"

"But you're here for a reason; you can't just miss your train for me"

"I told you the train doesn't matter, now come on and we can talk and I will explain" reaching out he took my overnight bag from me and started to lead me towards one of the many coffee shops within the train station.

Even after everything I've done to him, he's still the gentleman I know he is towards me which only makes me hate myself more for walking away from him. That last sight of him looking so beaten and heartbroken will stay with me forever. I expected to come here and get a door slammed in my face and Barry telling me where to go – the last thing I expected is for him to treat me like this. A large part of me really wanted him to hate me. That is the least I deserve.

Entering the least packed coffee shop, we found a table. "What do you want?" I asked knowing Barry changes his coffee preference with each week that passes it's hard to know what he's into at the moment.

"I got it, Latte right?" he smiled before bouncing over to the counter before I could stop it. I'm happy the Barry I know is back but I also hate how nice he is being to me. I want him to hate me – why won't he hate me!

Flopping into one of the arm chairs by the table I sighed while digging into my wallet to find five bucks to pay Barry back which I know he will decline so taking a quickly glance toward him – happy he isn't looking I slipped it into his duffle bag for him to find later, it's the only way I'm going to be able to pay the stubborn guy back.

Sitting back in the chair to look as causal as possible, I watched Barry as he paid for our order and moved to the end of the counter to collect them. Unable to stop myself I found myself biting my lower lips at his ass, concealed behind the snug yet comfortable skinny jeans he's wearing. Making his ass looks round and very juicy, enough to make me want to sink my teeth into it. Is it normal to think about your ex like this? Since the moment I set eyes on him I have been undressing him with my eyes but I don't have to use my imagination when it comes to what is underneath I've seen up very up close and personal but he does look a little more buff as if he's been hitting the gym – maybe he's been going with Eddie after work. Not that it matters because whatever he is doing I can official say it is working for him. He looks better than ever and it only makes me want him more. To get him back between the sheets and for us to stay there and hit pause on the rest of the world around us while he takes me back to paradise.

"Caitlin… Cait" Barry snapped his fingers in front of my face to get my attention.

"Sorry in my own world" I spoke the truth while thinking that if he calls me Cait on more time then I will happily take him right here on the table – looking at the table I began to calculate if it is sturdy enough to take our weight combined.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Trying to calculate if this table could support our joint weight" I replied without looking up from the small wooden table. Realising what I said I snapped my head up to look at him feeling my cheeks redden by the second after all I did just pretty much tell him that I'm thinking about having my way with him on the small coffee table separating us. "Oh my god, forget I said anything – anyways are you sure you don't need to catch a train?" I quickly tried changing the subject again before I slowly kill myself with embarrassment.

"I'm sure – I was going to catch a train to Coast City" his chosen location caught my attention making me pause mid sip of my latte, needing him – no wanting him to keep talking. "I was coming to see you but you beat me to it"

"Lucky for you then – but why would you come and see me?" I asked not that I wouldn't have been happy to see him. If I had of taken a nap before leaving Coast City would he have beaten me there before I got on the train to come here? How would he know where to find me? So many questions sprung to mind.

"Because we have unfinished business that needs finishing"

"We do?" I asked confused, I didn't think we had anything to finish, I thought we finished six months ago.

"Yes but first off why are you here in Central City Dr Snow?" sitting forwards Barry rested his elbows on his knees, his green eyes searching my face for the answer.

"You know I like it here at Christmas" I tried playing it off casually as if it was no big deal. It's not as if I can blurt out to him that I made a huge mistake in leaving and that he is the best thing that ever happened to me – that I wish I never left him or what we had besides I'm not ready for the I told you so that well no doubt follow my declaration.

"That's nice but it's March" narrowing his eyes at me, he always did know when I'm lying and not just because of the fact I am months out on my seasons but he has been able to tell when I'm lying since day one.

"So I'm three months late or nine months early depends on how you look at it" I shrugged trying my best to avoid eye contact with him but no matter where I looked my eyes were always drawn back to his. Picking my latte back up, I began to take slow cautious sips due to the temperature.

"Speaking of nine months – why didn't you tell me you thought you were pregnant?" upon hearing his question I began to choke on my latte, my eyes finding his over the rim of my mug. "And don't bother lying to me, my dad told me the truth"

"Does he realise he broke patient confidentiality?"

"What did you expect him to do when I'm sat heartbroken on the sofa, wondering if there is anything else I could have done to make you stay here?"

"Barry can we please not do this here" I asked noticing the other customers looking in our direction.

"I need to know why?"

"And I will tell you but can we go somewhere a little more private and talk about this – How about my hotel?" I suggested knowing if we're finally going to have the conversation we should have had six months ago then I don't want to do it in front of random people who will no doubt use this as gossip to more people we don't know. It's going to be a hard enough subject without having witnesses to it.

"OK let's go"

Downing the rest of our drinks, Barry didn't waste any time in collecting our bags from beside the table and marching towards the exit of the train station to get a cab. Following behind him as fast as I could in my shoes, I caught up to him as he placed our bags into the trunk of the cab. Climbing into the backseat, Barry joined me seconds later as I gave the hotel name to the driver. Pulling away from the station I sat looking out of the window playing out every possible outcome to how the next conversation could go and none of them I really liked the idea of.

* * *

 **And here you have it … they're reunited and I know it's nothing special but it is a foundation as to what is to come next …**

 **What do you think is coming next?**

 **How will Barry really react to Cait's confession?**

 **And her dirty thoughts are coming back and I know one person (Yes I'm looking at you) who is extremely happy about that.**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – firstly – of all the places to hit me you choose the shoulder …. Why? I knew you would like Cait's inner thoughts – you know I put them in there for you. I think a lot of people were calculating if that table could support them both. Anyways I'll speak to you on twitter once you've read this.

 **Snowb4rry01** – thank you … I think a lot of people were thinking about Barry's ass while reading this chapter and calculating if that table is strong enough to hold them both.

 **Katmerlos** – who doesn't have them thoughts about Barry…? I've had them about Barry… Squishy and Barry and Squishy at the same time – now that is probably sharing a little too much but oh well. Enjoy this chapter.

 **Guest** – do you need help getting up … you could always use the table if Barry and Cait are finished with it. I knew dirty Cait would be a hit … everyone loves her.

 **TheLastWinchester** –

 **Guest** – you're going to find out now … the table is a very big talking subject … would it or wouldn't it hold their combined weight?

 **Guest** – thank you … enjoy this chapter.

 **ShanouNash** – Cait is part of the Allen family … well now you get to find out what happens and what is said during that talk.

 **SoManyFandomsUrHeadExplodes98** – do you need a paper bag or something or are you ok? I just need to check … well your wait is finally over.

 **Isaboo26** – Cait does have a dirty mind (readers favourite) and some do make it out of her mouth.

 **Lizzy-Margaret** – you'll have to wait and see.

 **Foreveryoung07** – who doesn't love her dirty mind … brings some of New Beginnings into Take Me Home.

 **DenisseW.H.D** – well your wait if over… enjoy.

 **01Eggy10** – you can be the judge on if this chapter is any good… I think that is the popular opinion to have them back together we'll just have to wait and see what happens.

* * *

Arriving at my hotel room or my home for the next two night faster than I knew possible thanks to Barry – no I'm not joking upon arrival at the hotel Barry all but threw my card at the receptionist in a bid to get her to check me in quicker. Once she had done that he all but scoped not only my bag and his bag back into his arm but also me as I was in the elevator and riding up to the tenth floor within the blink of an eye. If anything Barry was being rude to the staff and I didn't like it. The young woman behind the large reception desk was only trying to be nice and Barry all but told her to shut up and do her job, when asked if we needed help up to my room with any bags Barry pretty much told her that he is more than capable of getting one small bag upstairs without help. Anyone would think she was trying to hurt his male ego on purpose but he was doing that all by himself.

I don't know what happened between the train station and the hotel but the Barry at the station has been replaced with clone because the rude Barry with me now isn't any Barry I know and I know Barry better than her probably knows himself so I know he is never rude especially to females.

"What is your problem?" I asked spinning on the spot to face him the second the door to my room closed behind us both.

"I don't have a problem" he looked at me as if I had just asked him the most outrageous question known to man. "What makes you think I have a problem?" he asked tossing the bags onto the king size bed, spinning back around to look at me.

"The Barry I know would never speak to people the way you just have, have you banged your head, do you have a concussion? Do I need to check you over?" I asked knowing that could be the only reason for this behaviour at the moment.

"Stop trying to avoid it – let's talk about the real reason we're here"

Walking over to the window I stared out at the limited view of Central City, not that I can complain I didn't come here for the view. I came to release the feeling I had trapped inside but looking out over the city that I once called home, where I found myself to be the happiest I have ever been since my father died, it made me wish I hadn't of come because off the secrets are coming to the surface especially the ones I wanted to forget and hoped Barry would never find out but he did so I need to face the music and explain myself to him because that is the right thing to do, even after all the time that has passed he deserves the truth.

"You do understand I can report your dad for breaking patient confidentiality. He didn't have my permission to tell you, he could lose his right to practice medicine" I spoke into the window, avoiding Barry knowing what would happen if I was to report Henry for telling Barry about the baby that never was.

"Are you going to report him?" I could sense him behind me and wanted nothing more but to turn into him but I can't do that – he isn't mine to do that with anymore.

"No" I replied honestly folding my arms over my chest. "I can't report him for it; he only did what I should have done six months ago"

"Then why didn't you tell me?" his hand came to rest on my shoulder at one point in time I would have taken comfort in that but no I feel the emptiness inside expand with his touch, the emptiness he used to fill.

"I don't know" I shrugged taking the opportunity to remove his hand from my body.

"Cut the bull Cait – was there a chance it wasn't mine?"

The more I allowed his words to sink in, the angrier I got. Flashes of red flicked before my eyes as I turned to face him cause between punching him, slapping him as hard as I could or clawing his eyes out. Is he honestly accusing me of cheating on him when I came here having been in that position? Knowing what it can do to a person, how broken and abused you feel knowing the person you thought loved you was in somebody else's bed when they should have been with you – does Barry honestly think I could do that to him?

"I'm going to give you one chance to take that back" I spoke through gritted teeth knowing if he doesn't I don't know how much longer I can hold my anger in for. "You take it back or get you right now" I felt tears begin to form at the corners of my eyes. The idea that Barry thinks I could to that hurting more than if I had of done it. Does he honestly think that little of me?

"I can't think of any other reason as to why you wouldn't tell me about this – I have known for a while and every time I think about it. This is the only explanation that makes sense, I know it isn't true but I don't know why you wouldn't tell me"

"I was terrified Barry – that is the reason I never told you" I threw my arms up into the arm, all the invisible barrier I had cocooned myself in for protection now gone as I stood bare before him.

"What why?" he grab me by the arms forcing me to look at him. "Why would you be terrified of tell me?"

"Because everything was messed up at the time, I had been offered the job in Coast City and we were finally in a good place a really happy place. Suddenly the idea of a baby sent me into meltdown, I was going to turn the job down in Coast city and stay here with you and forget it ever happened and then suddenly the idea of a baby scared the hell out of me. I wasn't ready to be a parent and you're pretty much a child yourself at times the idea of us bring a baby into this world was terrifying and it's because of that scare I went to Coast City" I admitted. When I got offered the job I was going to turn it down and stay with Barry and work on my life here – our life here together but then when the test came back negative I knew I had to go simply for the fact that if were separated then there is no chance of us bring a baby into this world. It might sound selfish but we weren't ready for that, nowhere near ready for night feeds and diaper changes.

"But we should have dealt with it together – we were together Caitlin. A partnership we should have shared that experience and the outcome – ok we might not have been ready to be parent but if you were pregnant what would have happened then" Barry asked the question I still haven't answered for myself in the time we have been separated.

"I guess I would be a lot fatter now" I joked not knowing what else to say.

Laughing Barry shook his head, his laugh echoing in my mind as if hearing it for the first time all over again. "I think that we would have made it work, we might not have everything right but what first time parents do – that's why the child has grandparents but it doesn't matter. I just wish you would have told me about the scare, you shouldn't have gone through that alone"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you" I shot him an awkward smile, feeling as if a little weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

"So you went to Coast City to get away from a scare?" Barry raised his eyebrow at me.

"If we stayed together another scare or the real thing could have happened – we did have good sex and a lot of it" I shrugged. The sex was amazing – it's one of the things I miss most about leaving Barry and Central City.

"You're wrong the sex wasn't good – it was amazing"

"Off topic now" I warned taking a couple of backwards steps to put some space between us.

"You brought the subject up, I'm just agreeing"

"Don't you have anything better to do today?" I asked feeing my eyes getting heavier and heavier as the seconds ticked by.

"Not really, I think we should continue talking about the amazing sex we used to have – we can't forget about that thing you used to do with your tongue"

"I have no idea what you are talking about" I looked away from him.

"I forget I had the tongue thing, your hands liked exploring" from the corner of my eyes I could see the smirk proudly sat on his face while I tried my hardest to forget all about his tongue and every other part of his body but failing miserably as the memories came flooding back.

With a huff I turned back to look at him wondering what the hell he is playing at, slowly his tongue ran across his bottom lip sending a shiver straight down my spine to between my thighs knowing exactly what that tongue is capable of doing.

I don't know who made the first move but suddenly my back was pressed again the neutral coloured wallpaper of the hotel room while my lips moved rapidly in time with Barry's, all the months that separated us fell away making it feel as if we had only been apart for a weekend. My hands exploring the ripped muscle on his chest to begin with before moving around to his back – the hard muscles he's clearly been working on hidden behind his thin sweater becoming clearer and clearer beneath my fingers as I traced the outlines.

Barry hands find mine, pinning them above my head while pushing his body onto to mine harder causing a moan to escape my mouth. This could be the biggest mistake of my life – no our lives but right now it's so worth it because this is all I've been able to think about for the past six months. Barry's lips on mine again. Will it make leaving again even harder – most probably as I know we still might have something here and I still haven't told him what I wanted to tell him which was the main reason for coming here but I have all weekend – I'll find my moment.

Suddenly Barry's phone sprung to life making us realise what we were doing, breaking apart we looked at each other breathless as Barry pulled his phone from his pocket, answering it without looking who was calling – his eyes fixed on mine, just like mine on his neither of us able to look away.

"Joe what's up" Barry spoke into the phone, trying his best to hide it breathlessness but I could see his chest rapidly rise and fall just like my own. "No problem … I'll be in as soon as I can"

"You have to go" I spoke for him knowing what he was going to say. I could see the regret in this eyes but I also know that we both know it's probably for the best before whatever just happened gets out of hand and complicates things further.

"I'm need at the lab, someone called in sick and they want me to cover as no one else is available"

"You don't need to explain to me – I should get some sleep. I worked a night shift and still haven't slept. You better go – we both know how your time keeping is" I laughed knowing somethings will never change and Barry Allen's super tardiness is one of them.

"Can I see you tomorrow?"

"I have plans tomorrow but I we can meet up tomorrow night" I offered knowing I have lunch with Nora tomorrow afternoon.

"I'll meet you here at say seven?"

"I'll see you around eight then" I opened the door and all but pushed Barry out of the room.

Sliding the do not disturb sign onto the door, I removed my bag from be bed and feel face first into the crisp white sheets. Why am I doing this to myself again? If his phone hadn't of rang would we have continued? We both know the answer to this … how am I supposed to survive a night with him if I can't keep my hands off him for five minutes? Tomorrow night is going to be tricky … very tricky indeed.

* * *

 **Sorry for the long wait again … I am trying my hardest to post as often as I can.**

 **What do you think will happen next?**

 **What do you want to happen on Cait's and Nora's Lunch? Should Cait talk about Barry or not?**

 **10+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… I hope I don't disappoint with this chapter… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – I still don't know why I reply to you on here, I talk to you like every day on twitter about everything I write so I'll speak to you on there when you're done reading this.

 **Raquel** – well lucky you that you had two to read… as for lunch you can find out now.

 **Guest** – thank you.

 **Spidey2026** – she hasn't told him why she's come to Central City – she will tell him next chapter maybe so you will find it all out then.

 **Guest** – why was Barry being a dick?

 **ShanouNash** – well the dinner is next chapter so you will find out all then … as for lunch with Nora enjoy.

 **SoManyFandomsUrHeadExplodes98** – why do I want you to have a heart attack … that isn't nice.

 **Lizzy-Margaret** – who knows if they will get fully back together … you will have to wait and see what happens.

 **Guest** – then yay you got what you wanted.

 **FlashFrost** – well I've updated now so yay and enjoy.

 **Fannieherr** – thank you … I hope you like this one.

* * *

Walking into the restaurant where I had agreed to meet Nora, I saw her sat at one of the tables and began to feel nervous. All day I have looked forwards to seeing her and catching up but with what happened with Barry yesterday he is the only thing I can think about. The whole idea of coming here was to tell him that I missed him and I have no idea what I want to happen, do I want to hear that he misses me to – yes I did but what does that mean for us. Our lives are in two different places he's here in Central City and my life is in Coast City. For all I know he's told Nora what happened and she could hate me for playing with his feelings again.

As I slowly approached the table, her eyes finally found me and a smile spread across her face which can only be a good thing right? So she is happy to see me – that did fill me with a little more confidence. Standing up from her seat, she engulfed me in a tight bear hug as if she hasn't seen me in years, it's not as if we haven't spoken in the time I've been gone. She thinks it's her duty to keep in inform in all forms of gossip that is circling this city – afraid I'm going to miss anything. I know more about what is going on here since I left than when I did when I lived here thanks to her.

"You've lost weight, I don't like that" she held me at arm's length looking me up and down from head to toe.

"Nice to see you too" I joked as the most I expected was a hello from her not something to do with my current weight.

"And you're looking paler, are you feeling ok? Are you eating properly?" she finally released me allowed me to take my seat across the table from her.

"I'm fine stop worrying about me. I'm paler because I'm working unreasonable hours and I'm indoors most days" I reassured her wondering how long she is going to worry about me. I know she worries about Barry and he's sort of used to it now but I'm not. I'm not even her daughter and she worried about me. I know I should be thankful that someone does care about me but I expected to come here, catch up and have something to eat and that was it. Not be told that I'm getting thinner and that I look pale.

I was thankful when the waitress arrived at the table to distract Nora with a drinks order which I should have known wouldn't be a soda, instead she went straight for the mimosa's which right now I am thankful for. I could really use a drink right now – shame most of it is orange juice. Giving the waitress our food order while she was here, she quickly left us which made Nora's attention turn back to me.

"Have you spoken to Barry since you arrived?" she asked so much for an afternoon not thinking about Barry, I now have to speak about him. She is going to make this lunch easy I thought to myself.

"I saw him yesterday. He was at the station when I arrived here – turns out he was about to get on the train to Coast City to see me"

"That boy was going to leave town without telling me, wait until I see him"

"Nora he's a grown man" I laughed not that it matter to her, Barry is still going to be in trouble for even thinking of leaving without telling her. She probably would have been on the next train after him, failing that poor Henry would be driving to Coast City to get his ass if he had made it onto that train.

"He's still my baby boy, it doesn't matter how old he gets – I'm still going to worry about him. Enough about my idiot son did you tell him why you came here?" she might have changed the subject but if I know Nora then I know she is secretly lecturing Barry in her mind – it's almost sweet how much she cares about him.

"Not yet, we're having dinner tonight but I don't know if I should tell him" I admitted because he looks to be moving on or trying to and I don't want to do something that will hurt him again. I want him to be happy and someone else can make him happy so I don't want to fill him with fake hope.

"You tell him and you tell him the truth" she pointed at me but I couldn't help but feel she had other reasons for me wanting to tell him the truth about how I feel.

"He's moving on Nora, I can't set him back like that – make him think that we have a chance when we don't"

"He isn't moving on Caitlin, he's trying to find a replacement and it isn't working. He's trying to replace you not get over you"

"But we don't have a future, at one time maybe we did but now I don't see it" I admitted, I would love nothing more than to have a future with Barry but it will never work. He's here, his life is here and we've already ruled out him moving to Coast City and my life is there. How can we possibly have a future?

"Caitlin if you want that future together then make it happen, nothing is stopping you from moving back here. You said yourself the job isn't what you thought it would be. You went because you had to try well you've tried it so come home. You're supposed to be with Barry and he's supposed to be with you – you're perfect for each other. He pushes you to do things you never thought you would and you keep him from doing stupid things and killing himself"

It was at that point the waitress decided to arrive with our drinks almost as if she could tell I needed it. Let's hope they were generous with the alcohol, without allowing my drink to settle on the table I swiped it up and had it to my lips in record time.

"Have you forgotten the whole broke his heart thing – he's never going to forgive me for that" I spoke around the rim of my glass.

"Caitlin, I changed that boy's sheet throughout his teen years. If I can forgive him for that then he can forgive you for this" I could be wrong but it was almost as if I saw her shudder at the thought. "And I mean they didn't fold – they snapped"

"I didn't need to know that" I informed know but now I know that Barry was a horny little teenager – then again he's like that now so not much has changed expect his sheets are clean.

"If you ever have a son, once they reach the teenage years – install a lock on that bedroom door. Believe me you will thank me. No mother should have to see their son doing that"

Finishing the rest of my drink, I quickly signalled to the waitress for another as I'm going to need it. "Thanks for the tip"

"Then again this could be my future grandson we're talking about. Tell Barry how you feel and make it work, if you have to move back here then do it – you have family here and we all miss you. We're always going to be here when you need us but I can't watch Barry continue how he is, he misses you as much as you miss him"

"I'll think about it" I told him knowing I had a lot of thinking to do before I meet Barry tonight. If anything I want this lunch to be Barry free as he's all I've thought about for weeks – nonstop.

Suggesting a change of topic I asked Nora to fill me in on any gossip that is going around which she is more than happy to share. After listening to how she thinks her neighbour's wife is having an affair for the best part of an hour while we ate. It made me almost excited to see Barry as it doesn't involve affairs or any of that stuff.

* * *

 **I know it's short but it's just a filler chapter to lead into the next one.**

 **How do you think dinner is going to go next chapter?**

 **Will Cait tell him how she really feels?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – yet again still don't know why I'm replying to you here as you pretty much talk to me on twitter while I write chapter but who cares … I'll say Hello and speak to you on the other side

 **Guest** – I'm very sorry about that but I end chapters where I think they need ending.

 **Guest** – thank you very much… I write Nora like this because it makes me laugh and who wouldn't want someone like that in their life?

 **ShanouNash** – I'm sorry for making you wait but I'm only doing it at the right pace or else it would be too rushed. I love Nora she is the best.

 **Guest** – What do you expect from a teenage boy? And your wait is over… enjoy

 **FlashFrost** – they do have a great relationship … if only Cait hadn't of left Cait could have been her Daughter in law.

 **Fannieherr** – nope he didn't wet the bed I can promise you that.

 **Isaboo26** – we do all need a Nora Allen in our lives… they would be very entertaining.

 **Sam** – I love Momma Allen and everyone knows that … that is the only reason we get Cait/Barry and Nora chapters because she is the best.

 **Foreveryoung07** – we did have something like that in NB when Nora told Cait about Barry losing his virginity.

 **Yara** – I'm sorry you feel like that but I also know a lot of people like her which is why I wrote the chapter.

 **H0neybunny16** – well I'm updating now … so enjoy

 **PiotrMc** –well you don't need to wait that long so it's not too bad.

* * *

Arriving outside the restaurant that Barry had made a reservation at, the same reservation we are now late for due to Barry being unable to arrive somewhere on time – some things never change. I paused outside the entrance making Barry turn to look at me as if I was losing my mind. A sudden feeling of uncertainty and fear set up camp in the pit of my stomach as I looked between Barry and the chrome framed glass door of the restaurant. I wanted to spent time with Barry; I wouldn't have come all this way if I didn't but at the same time I don't want to sit on the opposite side of a table to him, surrounded by a room of strangers while we try to pretend everything is ok when it isn't. We still have so much to talk about – especially the big elephant in the room that we both keep avoiding.

"I can't do this" I back stepped away from the door.

A look of panic settled on his face as he followed my steps away from the door, it also didn't help how the place he chose is the same place we went on our first date – the date he won by winning at miniature golf. It only reminded me of what I walked away from. Coming her to begin with is hard enough, having to admit to him that I miss him and made a mistake is harder still without having to do it in the same place we had our first date. The first date I will never forget where we looked out over Central City and the place I first saw a future with Barry. I wanted to hate that date but he showed me how sweet he is, all the detail he went to planning that first date and then I ruined everything.

"You don't want to have dinner with me?" he asked stepping closer to me still as I stood looking up at that glass wall where I stood on that very first date. The memory of him standing beside me as we both looked over the city as if it was ours to do with as we please.

"I do but I don't want to sit in there and pretend everything is ok" I told him the truth my arm flying out to point at the entrance. Is it too late to pretend I'm sick? Then again Barry will want to care for me if I tell him I'm sick. Why can't he be like a normal person and be angry at me?

"But everything is ok between us, we're only having dinner"

"Nothing is ok between us. Barry I told you I was leaving two days before I left. I walked away from us and you're fine with it. Why can't you be angry at me, I want you to be angry at me but you're not, instead you're this calm sweet person and it doesn't make sense. You should be screaming in my face for me to leave you alone" anger I didn't know I was trying to suppress boiled over as I began to lose my temper with him. I wasn't even angry at him, I'm angry at myself for him not being angry with me. I'm angry at myself because I caused all this and it's a nightmare, nothing is going the way I want it too.

I should have my dream job but that turned out to be the worst thing imaginable, if it wasn't for my patients I would have walked away sooner. I'm angry because I got everything so wrong which has caused all this mess. I should have stayed I know that now – I should have stayed with Barry, he made me happy but as usual I find happiness and I have to ruin it. I was happy here in Central City, I had Barry, I had friends and I had a family feeling around me thanks to Nora and Henry and I gave it all up so it's no wonder I am angry at myself.

"Can we please be honest with each other, I don't want to sit in there and pretend everything is ok and I know you don't. We have to much unfinished business between us that we need to address before we can even think about moving forwards" I sighed shoving my hands into my pockets. Due to how late we are I'd be surprised if they even kept our reservation so why even bother at this point.

"Then what do you suggest?" Barry looked around us with a sigh, his hands outstretched to point at our surroundings.

"I suggest we go in there and get some Chinese and sit on that bench right there and talk" with one hand pointing at the small Chinese takeout and the other at the empty bench across the street, it was the best I'm coming up with at this point. We need to talk that is for sure and I don't want to do that with people we don't know listening in on our conversation from the table next us. "You go reserve the bench, I'll go get the food I know what you like" I told him, walking away before he had a chance to say anything. This will give me the perfect alone time to gather my thoughts I thought to myself as I crossed the street and headed into the small Chinese takeout.

* * *

Sitting side by side on the bench for what felt like a lifetime, neither of us saying anything both more interested in the food within the small containers. All my thoughts ran wild in my head as I tried to search for the words I wanted to say. I can't just blurt out that I miss him and hope he tells me he misses me too. We have so much to talk about but I have no idea where to start as every thought I have gets jumbled with something else and doesn't make sense anymore. There was a time we could talk about any topic for hours and now just finding something to talk about feels painful.

Deciding to bite the bullet I spoke the first words that came to mind just to break the silence between us. "I made a mistake" I admitted, I hate admitting when I'm wrong but on this occasion I'm wrong – everything I've done if wrong. Looking out the corner of my eyes at Barry for a reaction his chopstick paused halfway into his container as if he was processing what I said.

"Care to elaborate what mistake you made?" he spoke without looking up from his food.

"Everything – I ruined everything and that is my mistake. Everything you said to me was the truth. I should have stayed, my life was here and I walked away from that… I walked away from you and I can never forgive myself for that and you shouldn't forgive me either – I miss you Barry, I miss you so much and I know it isn't fair of me to just show up here and bump all this on you but I do miss you. I wake in the middle of the night and expect to see you there but you're not. My biggest mistake is and always will be walking away from you" once I began my whole confession fell from my mouth as the words I tried to find finally fell into place. Leaving him will always be my biggest mistake and he needs to know that.

"I have forgiven you, I was angry at first – so mad to be honest but I also understand you had an opportunity and you had to take it. I would have hated myself if I made you stay because I know a small part of you would have hated me for making you stay. You know I always wanted the best for you and this was for the best so I forgive you Cait because I miss you too"

"I played this moment out in my head so many times and each time I got a different result, I know we don't have a future and I wouldn't expect us to but I hoped we could still be friends" I wished we could be friends at the very least because these past six months without him in my life have been hell.

"I wouldn't accept anything less, I've wanted to call you every day for the past six months but I didn't think you wanted to talk to me" it was my turn now to pause mid-air as I turned to look at him. If he has of called I would have answered because I wanted to talk to him but didn't think he wanted to speak to me.

"It's not that great" I continued to poke at my food with my chopsticks. "The job I mean – it's not what I thought it would be. I actually hate it if it wasn't for my patients then it would have driven me to insanity by now"

"But you tried and that is what you said you would do" Barry reminded me. Nodding in agreement as that is what I said, I said I had to try or else I would regret it more and I have tried now I need to decide what is next. That is something I need to decide on my own.

Suddenly losing my appetite, I tossed my food into the trash beside us as every other topic of conversation we had yet to address came flooding to the surface, all the way back to making Barry promise me he will move on and I will try to do the same. I know Nora said he isn't trying to move on but find a replacement but I didn't think now was the time to bring that up. The hours slowly ticked by as we finally talked through everything we needed to and I slowly felt that weight being lifted off my shoulders.

"It's getting late" I looked down at my watch noticing we have been sat on the same bench for the best part of three hours.

"I guess this is goodbye again" we both stood up at the same time, turning to look at each other.

"How about a see you later, I mean you do have a ticket to Coast City so you could always come and visit a friend… my guest bedroom is yours if you want it" I shrugged knowing it would be a waste of a train ticket if it wasn't used and it would be nice to have a friend visit as that is all we are. Ex's can be friends and a friend offers another friend their guest bedroom.

"I'll think about it" Barry smiled and I couldn't help but smile. He has that effect on me still.

"So I might see you later then"

"Maybe"

Taking the chance I pulled him into a tight hug and pressed my lips against his cheek in a quick peck as Barry wrapped his arms around my waist. "Find your happiness" I told him as I pulled myself from his grip before I became attached to it again. I already don't want to leave again – I don't want to leave him so why make it harder for myself than it already is. With one last final glance at him I walked away and headed back to my hotel knowing I need to be up early to catch my train back to Coast City. Quickly glancing over my shoulder to see Barry still stood in the same spot I left him I gave him a small wave and continued on my way.

This trip may not have gone how I wanted it too but I said everything I came to say and it did make me a little happier to know that Barry misses me as well and it wasn't just me feeling that way. I'm just happy that we spoke and that we can part again as friends.

* * *

 **So there you have it … not what any of us were expecting but then again … you never can expect anything with this, I surprise myself at times.**

 **What do you think will happen next?**

 **Will Barry go and visit her?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – And the block is back …. Ugh…. I guess I'll talk to you on twitter as usual.

 **Raquel** – its ok I understand everyone has thing to do and I don't expect you to take time to read this … if you want to read it then that's your choice… I can't make you … so read it when you have time and no they didn't get back together and who knows maybe he will visit her.

 **Guest** – well I can't say much without giving to much away but watch this space… there are some twist coming.

 **Somanyfandomsurheadxplosed90** – that looks to be the popular opinion but can they really have a relationship how they are right now? But I'm with you … Barry kiss her you fool.

 **ShanouNash** – who knows what is to come next … apart from me as I write it but you know what I mean.

 **Guest** – is it that easy?

 **Isaboo26** – that is one possibility … I can't Cait would go mad at him if he did.

 **Yen** – thank you so much and isn't teasing part of the fun?

 **Lyssa** – I'm sorry… what can I do to make it better again?

 **Snowbarry** – looks that way.

 **Flashport90** – that's the big question … will he won't he… only time will tell.

 **A/N – sorry it has taken so long to update but if you follow me on twitter then you know why if not here is why … I decided to re-write this chapter which I should have done for the fact that I never kept a copy of the original chapter and when it came to writing this I was so blocked that it was almost painful to write so I'm sorry that this isn't the best chapter but I wanted to update so I stuck with this… the next one will be better I promise.**

* * *

"On my way Joe" I sighed into the phone as I answered. For some reason everyone at the CCPD thinks that my day off means call whenever you feel like it and I'll grab my kit and meet you wherever I need too. How hard can it be to hire a new CSI? I'm sure there are plenty out in the worlds somewhere if you looked hard enough at this rate they might as well give me a bigger lab so I have room to fit my apartment inside of it because lately I'm seeing more of my lab than I am my home.

"Sorry Barry but it's all hand on deck for this one" Joe replied clearly picking up on my pissed off tone, then again I am happy for the distraction – it saves me sat here thinking about how Caitlin is walked out of my life again.

"I get it, text me where and I'll meet you there as soon as I can" I replied hanging up without saying goodbye.

Dragging my moping ass into my bedroom, I pulled on some clothes and looked at the time knowing Caitlin is now on her way back to Coast City and who knows when I'll see her again. I know she asked me to visit her but if I do is that just giving us both some false hope? Visiting her means that somehow we both see a future for us both when there isn't one. Not while she's there and I'm here in Central City it would never work. If we're lucky we might see each other for one day a week with us both working shifts and that wouldn't be fair on either of us as our days off may never be the same. I can't expect her to come here and I'm working or vice versa. Believe me when I say I lay in bed last night for hours thinking about everything and anything – hoping to find a way to make it work and it's impossible. The only way it would work is if I moved to Coast City which we've both agreed wouldn't work or Caitlin moved back here which I can't ask her to do.

Leaving my bedroom, I collected my kit and placed it onto the table double checking I had everything I would need and making sure I didn't have to go by my lab to collect something – just like a scout a CSI is always prepared… for anything.

* * *

Arriving at the crime scene a little out of breath which makes me only realise that I should probably get a car – maybe I could use the extra money I'm getting for working all these extra hours can go towards one I thought to myself as I slipped under the police tape and saw the mass destruction before me. Now I finally realise why it is all hands on deck. Pulling my kit back onto my shoulder I made me way over to where Joe was standing.

"What happened?" I looked between Joe and Eddie wondering if they have found out any information in the time they have been here because at the moment it looks as if everyone is just standing around doing nothing.

"All we know is that the train derailed, we can't do much else at the moment until the fire department give us the go ahead as it's unstable at the moment" Joe replied as the tree of us stood watched member of all emergency departments run around working – everyone apart from the police who can only work on crowd control of people who have come to see what has happened.

"Where was the train heading?"

"It's the 11:30 to Coast City" Eddie said without looking away from the wreckage.

"No…No…No…No" I dropped my kit onto the floor as my world came to a standstill and my heart fell into my stomach. "This isn't happening" I took off in a sprint toward the train wreck trying to get my phone out of my pocket.

"BARRY" I heard Joe call after me, footsteps following after me as I sprinted towards the train.

"Calm down buddy it isn't safe" Eddie grab my arm, halting me in place when all I wanted to do is contact Caitlin praying she is ok. I know it's too much to ask that she missed the train; she is never later for anything so why would she miss this train.

"EDDIE LET ME GO" I started to fight against him but his hold became tighter as his arms wrapped around my torso to hold me back.

"I can't do that, you need to calm down. When we get the go ahead then you can get in there"

"Eddie, Caitlin is on that train. If you think I'm just going to stand here and do nothing you can forget it" I shot back trying to break free again.

"Barry, she will be fine. They will get her out" Joe appeared beside us but that didn't help. I needed to find her, make sure she is ok.

"I thought you were over her" Eddie asked with a confused look on his face. I know he isn't her biggest fan but if he cared about me at all then he would let me go and find her.

"Well I'm not over her; I love her more than anything. What would you do if it was Iris on that train?" I asked the both already knowing the answer, they would do anything to get inside that train to find her.

"Fine but I'm coming with you" Eddie sighed removing his jacket and handing it to Joe.

"Both of you be careful" he sighed walking away from us.

Eddie finally released me as I sprinted towards the train having no idea where to start looking. Dialling her number I pressed the phone to my ear as I pushed my way past the firemen trying to stop me once again, leaving it to Eddie to explain.

The longer Caitlin's phone rang the feeling in the pit of my stomach became stronger telling me something is wrong. Hanging up I called again praying she will answer or hoping I could hear it ringing to I have some idea on where to look but due to the noise around me I couldn't hear anything. Sighing in frustration I slid my phone back into my pocket and entered the first carriage along with the rescue team and began searching for her. Well aware of Eddie right behind me.

"CAITLIN" I shouted looking around the carriage for her.

"I'm going to go and help get people out of here" Eddie patted my shoulder. I nodded watching as I made his way further into the carriage. Pulling my phone from my pocket I dialled Caitlin's number again but heard nothing inside this carriage making me come to the conclusion she isn't in this one.

Climbing back out again, I moved onto the next one knowing there are only two more to search; she has to be in one of them. Pausing on my way down to the next one to search the people how have already been rescued to see if she is one of them but she wasn't which only made me fear the worst. She can't be dead – this isn't how it ends, I refuse for it to end like this. We're supposed to grow old together.

Climbing into the next carriage I began searching the people left all of them with injuries of some sort, some unable to move and other I didn't want to think about. Pulling my phone out again and dialled her number, hearing the faint ring off her phone which filled me with hope that was short lived due to the fact that if she is in here and isn't answering her phone then I can only think the worst.

"CAIT"I shouted making my way through the wreckage to find her.

"Help me" A women asked as I passed her, blood pouring from her head but other than that I couldn't see anything wrong with her. As much as it hurt me I ignored her and continued my search for Caitlin. I hated ignoring someone who needs help but my main focus is Caitlin, I need to know she is ok then I can focus on others who need help.

"I'll be back in a moment" I told the woman as I walked past her, checking every seat I passed for Caitlin. I know she is in here but where?

"CAITLIN" I shouted again hoping and praying for a response from her. "COME ON LATTE ANSWER ME"

"Barry" I heard a faint voice say bringing a smile to my face. She isn't dead I told myself. I don't need to worry as much because she is still with me and breathing.

"Cait I'm coming" I moved through the carriage as quickly as I could until I find her in her seat, bleeding, no doubt broken but still here. "I'm gonna get you out of here" I cupped her face in her hands forcing her to look at me.

"Barry" she said again almost surprised to see me.

Her face was pale and her blouse covered in blood from her head but the majority of it being from her side and arm. "You have to stay with me, promise me you'll keep looked at my face and keep talking to me"

"I'm tired Barry" she told me in a hushed voice her eyes falling closed. Lighting slapping her cheek forcing her to open her eyes, a small smile pulled at her lips as her brown eyes searched my face.

"You have to stay awake then I can get you out of here because I'm not going to lose you again" brushing her hair from her face, I pressed my lips against hers feeling her lightly kiss me back. "I'm going to try and move you now and it might hurt, just hold onto me" I wrapped her arms around my neck.

"I'm sorry for everything" she whispered into my ear. "Just remember that I'll always love you"

"You can tell me that when we get out of here, now hold on tight" I told her as I began to pull her out from her seat. Ignoring her scream of pain knowing that if I leave her here then she is going to bleed out and I can't let that happen.

Once free I cradled her against my chest, fighting my way back to the door of the train to get her out, thankful that the train is still upright or else this would have been a lot harder than it is. "Cait you have to stay awake, let me see your beautiful eyes" I said noticing her eyes began to close again.

"I want to sleep" her head lay against my shoulder as her eyes began to close again.

"I know you do but you can't – not right now. Tell me how we met" I said the first thing that came to mind, anything to keep her talking and awake. She's a doctor she knows how important it is that she stays awake especially until I can get her some medical treatment.

"It was my first day, I was already late and I needed my morning coffee after standing in line for a long time I finally got it until some idiot came crashing into me and spilt my latte all over the floor. If it was possible I would have downed him in it – ended his life" she began to tell me the story her voice becoming weaker and weaker with each word that left her lips.

"But did this idiot do it on purpose to make the beautiful girl talk to him?" I asked already knowing the answer. No I didn't, I just wasn't looking where I was going but if I had of seen her I still would have done it – just to make her talk to me.

"If you did then you chose the wrong girl to mess with her coffee" Cait gave me a weak smile.

Making it to the door of the train, I placed Caitlin down onto the floor so I could jump down onto the ground before lifting her out and into my arms again. "HELP, I NEED SOME HELP OVER HERE" I fell to the floor cradling an even weaker Caitlin in my arms, her head lying limply against my chest.

"I love you, always remember that I love you no matter what" she looked at me through barley open eyes.

"I love you too, so stay with me" I cupped her cheek; bring my lips down to meet her dry ones. "CAIT WAKE UP" I felt tears build in my eyes as I lightly tapped her face in an attempt to wake her but it was useless.

"I NEED SOME HELP OVER HERE" I shouted as my tears broke their barrier and began to flow down my cheeks.

* * *

 **I'm not too keen on this chapter but I'm finding it really hard to write at the moment but wanted to update… the next one will be better I promise.**

 **What do you think will happen next?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – Are you threatening me? I feel as if you are but we've had this conversation on Twitter so I'll talk to you on there when you've read this.

 **Raquel** – well your wait is over… enjoy.

 **Guest** – thank you… I'm happy you liked it. I wasn't sure about this chapter as it felt a little blah to me.

 **Somanyfandomsurheadxplosed90** – I don't know what to say to this, don't fall out with me , it will make me sad and then it won't be able to write because I'm sad. Whatever happens next Barry will be ok … he's strong he will survive.

 **ShanouNash** – Well they did meet in New Beginnings so that was the idea to bring a little NB into this story. Everyone is begging me now to kill her … I feel like god right now having Cait's fate in my hands.

 **Guest** – thank you very much … I hope you like this one just as much.

 **Isaboo26** – No I'm not kidding you and I can't say if she lives or dies.

 **Yen** – thank you, I was hoping for a cute moment between them this chapter and reading your review I achieved that.

 **flashfrost** – well I don't know what to say to this other than I hope you're wait was worth it and you enjoy this chapter.

 **Snowb4rry01** – thank you so much but Cait was always on that train, she's never late so she wouldn't have missed it. The first version of this chapter I wrote she wasn't on the train but it didn't make sense and bugged me as Cait is never late for anything so I had to re-write it all with her on the train.

 **Flashport90** – broken hearted Barry would be sad but we can all get through it together… I will set up a support group if I have too.

 **Lizzy-Margaret** – who doesn't like a little drama and angst?

 **DenisseW.H.D** – just a little I guess.

 **1ShannonB** – I can't promise you anything… you will have to read on to find out what happens next.

 **Foreveryoung07** – I can't promise anything.

 **Guest** – who doesn't like a little plot twist ever now and then?

 **Blueefaiiryy** – thank you … you will find out her fate now.

 **Jdcocoagirl** – I know it was very unexpected of him but all he cared about was finding Cait so it made sense for him to ignore anyone else until he found her and made sure she is ok. It shows his urgency to find her … well that is what I was going for.

 **Thekiller00** – you will have to read on to find out. I can't be giving away spoilers now can I .

 **Cece14** – thank you … I hope you will enjoy this chapter as much.

* * *

My eyes slowly adjusted to the bright lights surrounding me, my head felt foggy and my ribs and side pulsed with pain. Closing my eyes tightly again due to the brightness I tried to figure out what was happening, the last thing I remember is being on the train home which quickly brought back the memory of the crash and Barry – he saved me. Snapping my eyes open again, ignoring the brightness I looked around me at the dull hospital grey which confirmed I wasn't dead. Looking towards the windows that lined one side of the room, I noticed it was now dark out making me wonder how long I have been out for but my attention soon shifted to the tall figure stood looking out of the window.

He's here; he didn't leave me I thought to myself as a small smile formed on my dry lips as I watched him, making sure to stay as quiet as possible as to not alert him to my consciousness. If anything I can't believe he is still here, has he been here all along or just arrive. I may never know but I like to believe he has been here all along. I watched as he dug his hands deeper into his pockets, quietly mumbling to himself something I couldn't make out while he gazed out of the window. Looking at him I could see the worry in his body language, his shoulders hunched over while subconsciously his feet shifted every so often showing how anxious he is.

Taking in his appearance from behind he now wore dark jeans and a black sweater, something he wasn't wearing before which only makes me curious as to how long I have been here. When he rescued me he was wearing light denim jeans and a brown leather jacket so how long exactly have I been out cold for? Almost as if he could feel my eyes on him, Barry slowly turned around to look at me, his feet moving as fast as the speed of light towards me – in a blink of an eye he had crossed the room and was standing beside the bed, his face hovering over mine.

"Do you know what year it is?" he asked which made me even more confused. Surly I haven't been out for years – have I? I couldn't have because Barry looks exactly the same… well apart from the clothes.

"2016"I replied almost 95% sure it was the correct answer.

"Do you know where you are?"

"Well if this is heaven then I want to go back because some guys keeps asking me questions" I shot back wondering what's with all the questions. I know on TV they do this to patients who have suffered a head trauma and have been in comas for a while … has that happened to me. Noticing the look of disapproval on Barry's face I rolled my eyes at him "Hospital, at a guess Central City hospital"

"Do you know who I am?"

"Will you shut up asking me question Barry, I know who you are, and I know who I am. I know what year it is and I know where I am. It's my torso that hurts not my head but how long have I been out for?" I asked the one question I wanted to know most. How much of this day or how many days have I missed?

"Just a couple of hours, you lost a lot of blood but they've patched you back up so you're almost like new. You'll have to stay in a couple of days for observation but other than that you should make a full recovery" he pulled a chair up to the side of the bed. Turning my head to look at him I couldn't help but smile knowing he stayed with me after everything I have done to him he does still care about me.

"Thank you for staying with me" I reached my hand out, taking hold of Barry's that rested on the bed beside me.

"I wasn't going to leave you alone. That moment you fell unconscious in my arms was the worst moment of my life. I thought I lost you… for good" sadness casted over his features as if he was imaging his life without me, If he felt even the slightest how I would feel without him in my life then I know how he feels. Six months was hard enough but I knew he was still out there somewhere. The idea of him gone forever is something I never want to happen.

"You can't get rid of me that easily" I joked hating the direction this was going in.

"It isn't funny Caitlin" he sighed which told me he's being serious. I don't remember the last time he called me Caitlin; it's always Cait or even Latte – something I have come to accept now. Hearing him call me Caitlin unsettles me. "I watched you leave me once and that was hard enough but I knew you were in Coast City. I couldn't handle it if you would have died. What I said to you on that train is true, I love you, I always will love you and nothing will ever change that. It doesn't matter how many times you tell me to move on and find someone who makes me happy, I'm not going to do that because you're the only one I want, you're the one who make me happy and you're the one who owns my heart and no one else ever will. I should go get a doctor" he went to stand up but I gripped his hand tighter stopping him from doing so.

"Not yet, I want to talk" I shook my head hoping he will stay and talk while he'd being so open about how he really feels.

"There is nothing more to say. Were friends and I will just have to be ok with that" he looked down making me follow his line of sight to see him looking at our joint hands.

"You might not have anything else to say but I do" I began to play with his long fingers. "The moment I walked away from what we had was the hardest thing I have ever done. No one ever made me feel how you did, you made me the happiest person in the world just by being with you – even if you annoyed me half of the time. I spent six months thinking about you and it drove me insane. I hate my job, completely hate it. I spent more time sat behind a desk doing paperwork than I do treating people. I wish I never left because who knows what we could have had now and I will forever regret that but as I've already pointed out we don't have a future not while I'm there and you're here" sighing I looked up at the white ceiling above me, trying to gather my thoughts, to put them in order so what I am trying to say makes sense.

"We could always try long distance; Coast City isn't that far we can make it work"

"It wouldn't work, we both work shifts who is to say we would both get the same days off. It wouldn't be fair for either of us to travel and then be stuck alone while the other is working but I wasn't finished what I was saying" rolling my head to the side, giving Barry the look that said "You're always interrupting" which only made him smile that Barry Allen smile I love so much.

"I'm sorry continue"

"When that train crashed the only thing I could think about was you, wondering if I would ever see you again, if I would ever see you smile again – you're smile is my favourite thing in the world, just looking at you smile makes me want to smile. Then while I lay there I thought about us and what we could have had if I hadn't of left. I pictured us married, the house we would live in – our kids" I laughed to myself. "The little dog running around our feet"

"I have always wanted a dog" Barry laughed as I nodded my head in agreement.

"I know you have. We had what I could only describe as the perfect life. We had each other, family and friends but it was just a fantasy" I sighed remembering how real it all felt but it's not going to happen now, too many bridges need fixing between us for us to have that life. "And then you were there saving me like a real life superman and I will never be able to thank you for that. I love you Barry, you know I do but for now I think we are best of as friend even if it hurts us both" I hated to admit it but right now we need to be friend and nothing more. I would love to jump back into a relationship with Barry again but it's the wrong time to do so, not with him here and me in Coast City it would never work and we would end up hating each other because of it before we even think about a relationship again, I need to earn is trust again – something I know isn't going to be easy. I hurt him and he might not realise it but deep down he does hate me for that.

"How about I go get that doctor now before my mother returns and we never get a quiet moment" Barry laughed almost as if he wanted to avoid the direction this conversation was heading.

"Ok" I sighed releasing his hand and watching as he left the room when all he had to do was press the button on the wall and someone would have come to us. No doubt we went to get a break which I don't mind; we both need time to process what is happening here.

A couple of minutes later Barry re-entered the room, I expected him to sit back in the chair but instead he headed back over to the window his back facing me once again. "A doctor will be in shortly, if you require any pain relief then call for a nurse" he said while starring out of the window. "You've told me how you felt when that train crash and before the doctor comes in, I'm going to tell you how I felt" he spoke to the window. Opening my mouth to say something I closed it again moments later knowing I should just let him talk. "I felt as if my life had ended the moment I found out that train crashed, I knew you would be on it because you're never let for anything and I feared the worse. You had just come back into my life and then there is a possibility you've been taken again. I would have done anything in the moment to know you were safe and ok. My heart fell into my stomach at the thought of never hearing you laugh again because a world without you in it isn't a world I want to live in again. Six months was hard enough let alone the rest of my life. So if you still want to be just friends then I am ok with that"

A knock sounded on the door as the doctor walked into the room bringing our conversation to an abrupt end but personally I don't think either of us had anything left to say. Our feeling have been put out there and I know Barry isn't happy with my request of being just friends but for now that is all we can be anything else right now would be an even bigger mistake then when I decided to leave him.

* * *

 **Do you think they will be able to stay just friends?**

 **What do you think is next for them?**

 **Are they making a mistake and they should just get together or do you think they've made the right decision to be just friends?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – believe me you'll like the one after this… everyone will. Talk to you on twitter again.

 **Raquel** – No Nora this time but she will make her return.

 **Fannieherr** – I'm sorry about that but it can't all be happy, rainbows and flowers all the time. Keep reading everything will come together.

 **Somanyfandomsurheadxplosed90** – for now you're going to have to take this friendship crap but for how much longer?

 **ShanouNash** – everything will make sense sooner rather than later. The reason she doesn't go back is because she thinks everything she has there has been ruined by her leaving but keep reading things will work out I promise you.

 **Guest** – but does she still love him …. Of course she does. Keep reading it will happen.

 **Guest** – I have no reply to this to be honest.

– is it that simple plus no story if that happens.

 **Flashfrost** – well I don't know what to say to this but you might like the next chapter a lot.

 **Flashport90** – as I've said to others keep reading everything will work out … maybe sooner than you think

 **Jdcocoagirl** – I can't really comment on much of this but what I will say is keep reading and everything will be answered for you.

 **A/N: I'm sorry for the long delay I will try my best to update sooner for the next chapter. I just had a lot on these past couple of weeks but enjoy this chapter and let me know what you think.**

* * *

Exiting the car after giving my mom a light kiss on the cheek, I tossed my duffle bag and backpack onto my shoulder and started a slow sprint towards the bus, even after getting up two hours earlier than normal just to make sure I'm on time, I'm still cutting it close. Reaching the bus as the door started to close I slipped inside and showed the driver my ticket, with a small nod I slowly moved through the bus looking for a certain brunette who likes to think she can do everything herself. I've heard the expression that doctors make the worst patients buts Caitlin takes that to a whole new level, only yesterday was she released from the hospital having spent the best part of a week in there and instead of staying in town where people can help her recover she is already heading back to Coast City.

I've spent the past five days as the hospital with her, visiting her before or after work, even dropping in on my lunch break to see how she is doing and take her anything she might need especially with all her personal belongings being lost in the crash. In my absence my mom would spend time with her even accompanied by my dad in the evening while I was on the late shift, just so she knows that she has people here who care about her and that she isn't alone.

In the past week I like to think that we have made some progress in whatever sort of relationship we have now, things between us slowly starting to feel like how they were before she left. We spent hours talking about any topic that came to mind – just like old times. Everything left as if we had rewound the clock the only thing missing being the physical interaction between us. Yes I would kiss her on the forehead before I left but it wasn't the same, it was a simple goodbye not like how we used to kiss as if it was out last time we'd ever see each other and it's hard for me not to do that with her – she's my Caitlin… my Latte but she wants to be friends and I have to respect that even if it is the hardest thing I have to do.

Finally spotting her sat towards the back of the bus, I made my way to her. Spotting her curled up within herself, head resting on the window with her eyes shut she looked like the angel she always has been in my eyes, ever since the first time I accidently ran into her. Storing my bag above the seat in the storage compartment, I stood the seat beside her. Suddenly aware of someone beside her in the almost empty bus her eyes snapped open to look at me as the bus started its journey to Coast City.

A surprised looked crossed her face as her eyes searched my face. "What are you doing here?" she asked making it unclear if she was happy to see me or not. I'd like to think she is.

"I'm coming back to Coast City with you" I replied simply as if that wasn't obvious to her. After all I am sat on a moving bus that is heading to Coast City – it doesn't take a genius to work it out.

"No, no you're not. You need to get off this bus right now" she shot back which wasn't the reaction I was expecting from her. I expected her to be happy to see me. Not for her to tell me to pretty much leave her alone.

"Cait you need help, you've just been released from the hospital."

"I'm fine, I feel fine. I don't need any help" she narrowed her eyes at me, little does she know I've always liked it when she does that – just like when she bite her lip.

"I know you like to think you are wonder woman but you're not. It's ok to ask for help" she has always been suborn, thinking she is the one who is supposed to give the help and not receive it but even wonder woman needs help at times.

Her eyes searched my face again and I studied her face, slowly seeing her give in. she will next ask for help but I know her and I saw that expression that shows she is going to accept my help even if she didn't ask for it. "But you have work and Oh my god does Nora know you're here? She's going to flip" wide eyed she looked at me as if I am a dead man walking.

"Calm down, my mom brought me here, she knows I'm coming and she supports it as for work the captain has given me the week off so you're stuck with me for a week" I smiled knowing even if she doesn't like it she is getting my help for seven days until she is settled back at home and hopefully further on the road to recovery.

"Fine" she sighed sinking into her seat.

"You did tell me to come and visit so I'm taking you up on the offer – Coast City isn't going to know what hit it" I joked reaching for my backpack containing some reading material, my laptop and iPad as well as some snacks for the journey and anything else I could think we might need. "So Dr Snow, we have a long journey ahead of us, how about a movie?" I asked pulling my iPad from my bag and flipping the cover open.

"What you've got?" she asked as I pulled the little tray down in front of her and set my iPad up.

"The question is what haven't I got?" I smiled wiggling my eyebrows at her playfully causing her to lightly slap my arm. Settling for Ferris Bueller's day off, a classic even if I do say so myself, the one thing I haven't forgotten is that this is the second movie we ever watched together. Grabbing the large bag of Dorito's from my backpack, I placed the bag onto the floor and placed the chips between us knowing they're also Caitlin's favourites.

As the movie started Caitlin moved closer to me, linking her arm though mind, resting her head against my shoulder as we both focused on the screen. Resting my head on top of hers in return I dug into the large bag of chips pulling one out only for Caitlin to steal it before I could make it to my mouth. I know I shouldn't get my hopes up but it's moments like this that makes me feel and think that we do have a future together – somehow. Our movements when we're together are so natural; we fall into sync with each other as if we haven't spent six months apart. At times I feel like I have known her my whole life, she knows everything about me, I know everything about her so our story can't end like this – it can't end with friendship.

* * *

Arriving in Coast City, I grabbed both my bad and Caitlin's which contained the essentials she needed and some other things my mom had gotten her like clothes but mostly essentials while she was in the hospital. Following her off the bus I looked around me, I think I have been here once in my life when I was around eight, we came for a weekend break if I remember correctly. I remember running down the beach while my dad chased me and my mom cheered me on while sat on the sand. I always hoped to come back but we never did and now I am here I wished it was under different circumstances. I wish I wasn't here because my ex-girlfriend now friend is injured and needed looking after whereas I would have preferred to be here with Caitlin sharing a weekend break just the two of us but a guy can hope, maybe we can do that in the future.

Taking in my surroundings and the smell of the sea air I turned my attention to Caitlin. "Let's get you home" I started walking up the road, with the three bags on my back. We might not be a couple but I can still carry a ladies bag, especially an injured one.

"Barry" Caitlin spoke causing me to pause, only to realise she wasn't following me. Turning around I looked at her wondering why she wasn't moving but instead remained in the same position before I could open my mouth to say something she started to laugh. "Barry it's six miles in that direction" she pointed in the complete opposite direction to the way I was heading.

Turning around I headed back to where Caitlin stood laughing at me, groaning in pain inbetween. "How about we take a cab?" I suggested noticing a line of cabs waiting nearby.

"Barry Allen that is the best idea you've had all day but we're not going to my place – I need to stop by the hospital first" she smiled at me which only caused me to start worrying.

"Are you ok, Cait what's wrong?" moving to her side quicker than I've ever moved in my life, my eyes moved around her body looking for anything wrong with her, any sign that told me what was happening to her.

"Barry I'm fine, I have something I need to do. It will only take me and hour. You can drop me off then go to my place" she headed off across the road to get a cab.

Stood in astonishment at her, wondering if she has lost her mind or not. I took off in a small sprint to catch her up. She got released from the hospital yesterday and she thinks I'm going to let her stroll back into work the following day as if she wasn't involved in a major accident a week ago. Over my dead body will she be going to that hospital today, not to work that's for sure.

"Caitlin, have you lost your mind? You were involved in a major accident last week. You're going home to rest and recover" I caught her arm before she opened the cab door. I will stand her all day and night if I have to – I'll stay here until she agrees to go home if I have too.

"Barry I have patients, I need to check in. I no doubt have a mountain of paper work on my desk that is only going to get bigger" she tried to reason with me. I didn't care if she had the every sheet of paper in the world on her desk that isn't going to change anything. She is going him either to the couch or her bed. I don't care which.

"Does it look like I care about any of that crap? No it doesn't because I don't. The only thing I care about is you and your recovery. There are other doctors, paperwork can wait. We're going home and you can be as stubborn about it as you want but if I must I will carry you there"

In typical Caitlin Snow fashion her hands went to her hips, she huffed and pouted. Normally that would make me cave in and let her have her way but not this time. This time I'm standing my ground. "I hate you, when did you become so demanding?"

"Around the same time I almost lost you all together. Cait you're finally getting the colour back in your face, you're even walking without help. You need to rest so please can we just go." I motioned to the cab beside us.

"But –"

"No buts Cait put me in your shoes. If you were my doctor what would you tell me to do? Go to work or go home and rest"

"I hate you, how can you use me against me?" she pouted, folding her arms over her chest with a huff.

"One you don't hate me, we both know that – you told me so yourself and two because I know you're the only person you'll listen to. So what is it are we standing here all day or are we going?"

"Fine let's go but I'm going tomorrow" she pointed her finger in my face with narrowed eyes.

"We'll see" I smiled at her.

Opening the cab door before she could argue with me anymore, I motioned for her to get in which she did with a huff. Smiling to myself I slid in beside her as she gave the driver her address. Something tells me this week is going to be long and painful especially with Caitlin being the worst patient ever.

* * *

 **Can we all just agree that this week is going to be challenging for Barry.**

 **What did you think?**

 **What do you think will happen next… if you guess it then I will be surprised but I want to know what you think?**

 **8+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you all so much for reviewing… replies are below!**

 **AReiss215** – Well you've known about this chapter for a while but I hope you've finished your studying before reading this. Talk to you on twitter … maybe.

 **SamSam** – who doesn't love caring Barry? Barry makes her feel comfortable and at home because he is her home. Who knows what can happen in a week. Let's find out.

 **Raquel** – all ideas are good and one or two might just happen … watch this space.

 **Somanyfandomsurheadxplosed90** –

 **ShanouNash** – well the week together is going to be full of surprises for sure some twists thrown in there for fun and hopefully some heart-warming moments.

 **Guest** – thank you.

 **Guest** – they do say doctor's makes the worst patients and Cait is living up to that. How come when I ask that question everyone automatically goes to sex? She died almost die.

 **Jdcocoagirl** – well then I hope you like the moment between them in this chapter.

 **Blueefaiiryy** – a week alone together – let's see how long friendship last maybe it will last the week but maybe it won't we'll have to wait and see.

 **Isaboo26** – he's going to need a lot, Caitlin isn't going to make it easy for him.

 **InstaFaixhy** – thank you, I hope you continue to love it.

 **Invn1397** – continuing it don't worry. I didn't realise it had been so long since I had updated.

 **Ixsad** – well I hope your weekend was worth it? You'll have to let me know.

 **Haiven** \- well let's hope it continues to be addictive.

 **A/N – sorry for the delay. I didn't realise it had been so long since I updated until I started getting messages asking when I was going to update. So I decided to look when I updated and was shocked to see it had been so long so I apologize for that. I really am failing at the moment but I am trying my best to get these out as fast as possible but I keep getting ideas for new stories that I have to play with and I forget to come back to these. Anyways I hope this chapter is worth the wait.**

* * *

Bolting upright in bed, I groaned at the sharp pain shooting up the side of my torso as I checked the time on the clock beside the bed. Just after three thirty in the morning. Brushing my hair from my face, my skin covered in a thick layer of sweat I reminded myself it was just dream well more nightmare, it was just nightmare and it's not real. My world isn't ending; it hasn't completely crumbled around me. It's still standing and everything is fine so no need to panic I reassured myself. Tossing the sheets to the side, I sat climbed out of bed and headed towards the doors to get myself a bottle of water from the kitchen.

Spotting my pain medication on the kitchen counter I thought about taking a couple of pills to help with the pain in my side anything to stop the ache but as I reached for them my hand paused as I questioned if I really needed them or wanted them because they're there as a doctor I have seen how people have become addicted to things like that and I value my career more than pain killers. Swiping them off the counter I decided to deal with the pain on my own and headed back to the bedroom with my water, pausing by the guest bedroom on my way back to my bedroom seeing shining through the gaps around the door. Lightly knocking on the door, waiting to hear a response from Barry but hearing nothing, I quietly opened the door to see him propped up against the head board asleep, with a book in his hands reminding me how peaceful he looked while he's sleeping. Memories of all he mornings I would wake up before him and just watch him sleep, how his face would be completely relaxed and almost angelic, it makes me miss him even more.

Placing my water onto the nightstand, I stepped closer to the bed and tried to remove the book from his hands, finally able to do so by prying his fingers from his hold of the hardback book. Grabbing the book mark off the bed beside him, ignoring the shooting pain in my side again – telling myself it's all in my head. I closed the book and placed it onto the nightstand beside him. Barry stirred in his sleep, his green eyes slowly opening to look at me, a small smile appearing on his face before he looked around him.

"Cait what's wrong, is everything ok?" he asked panicked looked around the room once more, his emerald greens coming to settle on me again.

"Fine, I saw the light on and it doesn't matter – I didn't mean to wake you, go back to sleep" I smiled grabbing my water again. Why I thought coming in here in the first place was a good idea I don't know. We have already talked, I said what I wanted and Barry agreed I can't tell him something else now. Talk about mixed signals.

"It does matter, Cait what's wrong?" Barry took my hand in his, his thumb brushing over my knuckles.

"I wanted to talk but we've done so much of that lately but it can wait until breakfast"

"If you're here at almost four in the morning then there is a great chance that whatever you wanted to say can't wait, now come on get in and we can talk" Barry patted the bed beside him. Rounding the bed, I climbed into the bed beside him, lying down on my side that wasn't busted up from the crash to face him, watching as Barry rolling onto his side to face me, a toothy smile appearing on his face. "So what do you want to talk about? Boys, swap make up tips, shoes?"

"Stop it" I lighting pushed him, resisting the urge to roll my eyes at him.

"Isn't that what besties do?"

"I'm going into working tomorrow-"

"We'll see" Barry cut me off making me glare at him.

"Can I finish" I sighed. I know he's only trying to look after me and make sure I recover as quickly as possible and I love him for that and many other reasons but at the same time I'm not made out of glass. "I've decided to hand in my notice, I thought this job is what I wanted but it isn't. The crash made me realise a lot of things and one of them is that I'm trying to make the best out of this job when it is making me miserable. I like looking after patients, treating them and I don't get to do that often. It's mainly paperwork and I wanted to be out there with patients doing my job but that's not the main thing the crash made me realise" Grabbing the water from the nightstand I twisted the cap off and took a large mouthful, my throat suddenly becoming dry. I had all this planned in my mind. What I was going to say and now the time has come it abandons me and I have no idea what to say.

"So what are you going to do – job wise I mean?" Barry asked taking my long pause as a sign I has finished talking.

"I'm getting to that" I placed the water back onto the night stand. Take a moment to gather my thoughts. "I need to apologise to you because I keep giving you mixed signals and that isn't fair. I told you I only wanted to be your friend but I don't, I can't just be friends with you because you mean everything to me, you're my world but more importantly you're my home. When I thought I was going to die, my only thought was of you. Knowing I would never get to see you again. Leaving you was the biggest mistake of my life and I'll never be able to change what I did and I'll have to live with that. That look on your face as I drove away from you that day will haunt me for the rest of my life, I wanted to turn around and come back to you but we both know it wouldn't have been the same. I had to try and do this or else I would have retreated this but you will always be my biggest regret. I've lay in bed many nights wondering what you're doing, if I was still there what we would be doing. No doubt arguing over what movie to watch or what to have or dinner" I laughed to myself as the memory of how it was before flooded my mind. We could never decide on what to have for dinner to what to watch on TV or what movie.

"What are you trying to say Caitlin?" Barry asked and I knew from the use of my full name that he wanted to me to say it – he wanted the words to fall from my mouth.

"I've had the dream many times since I left Central City, what our future could have been like. Almost like a game show where they show the contestant what they could have won." Pausing I rolled onto my back to look at the ceiling. I don't know why I'm telling him this but now I've started talking I can't stop. It's as if I'm not going to get the chance to tell him any of this again so I need to tell hi it all now.

"What did our future look like?" feeling the bed beside my shift, Barry's hand slid into mine on the bed.

Wanting to turn my head to look at him, I stopped myself knowing if I did then I would probably lose my trail of thought and my mind would go blank again so instead I laced my fingers with his on top of the sheets and continued to look up at the ceiling.

"We were married, happily but you still annoyed me all the time." I told him which made us both laugh. We wouldn't have a relationship if Barry didn't annoy me. He annoyed me since day one; if he was to ever stop I don't think our lives would ever be the same. "We had this house with a big yard in a cute little neighbourhood not too far from your parents. We had kids – every dream would be different, a boy and a girl, two boys, two girls or sometimes we would have three kids and your mom would always be there being the doting grandmother just like she is mother and we had this cute little white dog"

"I have always wanted a dog" I could hear the smile in his voice without having to look.

"I know you have" I used to catch him looking up names online, at first I thought he was jumping the gun and looking at baby names and did panic a little thinking he wanted a baby right away until he started mentioning names like thunder then quickly realised he was looking at names for a dog and allowed myself to calm down a little.

"That future sounds nice, Dr Caitlin Allen – does have a nice ring to it"

"Mr Allen this is the twenty first century maybe you become Mr Bartholomew Snow, no one says I have to take your name, I could even hyphenate or keep my name " I informed him, realising we're starting a debate over a future that is only a dream.

"Point taken Dr Snow"

"Anyways what I'm trying to say is, I want to come back to Central City" I sighing I rolled back onto my side to face him. My hand remaining entwined with Barry's as I did so, mirroring my action Barry rolled onto his side to face me. A small smile tugging at the corners of his lips forcing small smile onto mine, one thing Barry has never failed to do – make me smile. "I not saying we have to but if you want too and only if you want too maybe we could try for that future because I miss you but more than that I love you and the crash made me realise that life is short and it can end at any time so you should grab every opportunity you can – so what do you say Mr Allen, do you want to try for that future?"

* * *

 **Sorry for the delay once again.**

 **What do you think will happen next?**

 **So Cait has done a fill 180 and doesn't want to be friends anymore – what do you think Barry will say?**

 **10+ reviews for the next chapter**

 **Thank you for reading.**


End file.
